Grand Theft Auto: Halifax

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Grand Theft Auto: Halifax, in stores now

Grand Theft Auto: Halifax is the latest installment of the interminable revenge-fantasy-for-the-impotent series of Grand Theft Auto computer games.

This latest installment features a new characters, Clayton Parker, and little big ray ray, like many other GTA protogonists, does not come from a criminal background but instead became lured into a life of crime after being bored by pwning n00bs and killing "dune coons" in Iraq. Parker starts out as a soldier at a base in Halifax where he meets Sgt. MacGillacutey and another local soldier named Murray MacKay who has criminal connections. MacKay tells Parker that he can earn over three billion times as much money he is making as a soldier by switching to Geico. At first Parker is hesitant to get involved in a life of crime but by the end of the game he has become a ruthless criminal mastermind. This game also includes a demo for the upcoming precursor Grand Theft Auto: Enfield which details Little Big Ray Ray's fall from grace.


Main Characters[edit]

Clayton Parker[edit]

The main protagonist (or antagonist) of GTA: Halifax, Parker starts out as a young man in the military who is lured into a life of crime by a fellow soldier. Because he is in the military and also has friends in the forces, Parker is able to have access to military weapons that have not been made available to many other characters in the GTA series.

Steve "The Enforcer" Murphy[edit]

He's the heavy you just don't fuck with, paired with the Frisk; they get the word out. One time a chump crossed the frisk and was forced to tattoo his face to his arm to serve as a warning for others. Steve also does charity work for the syndicate on the IWK Telethon (Incapacitate, weaken, kill) each year. The telethon is a method in which syndicate funds can be laundered.

Little Big Ray Ray[edit]

Once a mighty fire fighter, now Little Big Ray Ray has become mad after being called Little Big Ray Ray. No one knows his true name and he enjoys supporting small businesses, especially pizza places.

Murray MacKay[edit]

Another soldier at the base, he is also involved in criminal activities on the side. He and Parker eventually leave the forces to start a crime syndicate.

Cole Preston[edit]

A gangsta from Uniacke Square, an upscale gated community. Parker meets him through MacKay. He gives Parker and MacKay connections to the city's drug markets and eventually joins Parker's crime syndicate. His special abilities are robberies and drive-bys.

Angus MacDonald[edit]

Arms dealer originally from Scotland who befriends the other three characters and eventually joins their crime syndicate. Speaks with a thick Scottish accent that resembles that of Fat Bastard from Austin Powers. Plays the bagpipes in Scotia Square and wears a kilt (with no underwear underneath).

Supporting Characters[edit]

Ricky, Julian, and Bubbles[edit]

The characters from Grand Theft Auto: Sunnyvale Trailer Park return for the latest installment of the Grand Theft Auto series. The boys help the main characters on several missions and can be found at Bubbles' Mansion downtown or in the Sunnyvale Trailer Park.

Sgt. Ian MacGillacutey[edit]

The overzealous soldier from Grand Theft Auto: Theft Under A Thousand makes a second appearance in GTA: Halifax. He has recently been transferred from Sydney to Halifax for undisclosed reasons and now supplies the main characters the military hardware they need for their criminal crusades.

James Jefferson[edit]

The pilot from GTA: TUAT makes a return in GTA: Halifax. He now flies cargo planes out of the Brian Mulroney International Airport. He smuggles drugs out of the city for the main characters and helps to smuggle arms in.

Premier Rodney MacDonald[edit]

Corrupt politician and Premier of Nova Scotia, he enlists Parker and MacKay to take out political rivals. MacDonald is a notorious womanizer and he hooks up both Parker and MacKay with some hot pieces as a reward for their good work. Steve just watches. After he is not reelected, he falls into disarray and becomes a heroin addict.

Premier Darrell Dexter[edit]

After defeating Rodney in an election, he becomes the premier of Nova Scotia in the later half of the game. Darrell wants to crack down on crime, but is too high to do anything about it. Clayton must deliver weed to him to keep him from passing Bill 567, which would place security cameras on every block and have a police officer at every corner.


Grand Theft Auto: Halifax uses accurate maps of the HRM in the game. Only a few place names have been changed to similar but more funnyier names. The game also features real Halifax radio stations and has been praised as an accurate portrayer of life in Nova Scotia. The game took over two years to make and it made use of satellite images to construct the city. A small coalition of Halifax residents attempted to punch Rockstar because it portrays the city as violent and a drug haven. After it was discovered that Halifax has a high rape and murder rate when compared with the rest of Canada and is the second most active drug city after Vancouver, the residents dropped their suit and Rockstar continued to develop the game.

Bus Service[edit]

Many of the missions require you to take the bus. To add to the cleverness of the game design, the bus fare always changes each time you ride due to inflation. Unlike real life the '1' runs 24/7. You can also store your Idealbike on the front of the bus. Remember its your own damn fault if your bike gets destroyed from a drivers road rage due to idiot drivers. Don't forget to get a transfer to ride the Homosexual to dartmouth instead of commuting the the darkside via the bridges. Be prepared for a long ride and random personal conversations, as well as the local weird folk.



  • Your first job requires you to take part time work for a temp agency working at the metro center. Though most of the mission requires a lot of sitting and smoking paid work will arrive in the form of making the ice surface for a Greathead game.
  • Casino Taxi Levels
  • 'lights out' you have to drive the entire length of the peninsula without hitting a traffic light in seven minutes.
  • Base Taxi
  • Manhunt: Sleepwatcher - Find him before he finds you.
  • Citadel Shootout - You must single handedly defend Citadel hill from a rise up of Dartmouth trash.


Halifax Penisula[edit]

  • Downtown - The main business district of the city; a good place to make money selling drugs but beware of the cops.
  • Pete's Guntique - For a fine selection of guns and ammo. Try the salad bar.
  • Autumn Garden - A public park full of trees, they look especially attractive in the fall which is how the park got its name. A great place to take women you pick up at night
  • Poormond - A ghetto full of drugs and prositituiton
  • North Halifax - Mostly apartments located near the MacKay bridge
  • Cesspool District - named after the amature football club, cesspool united.
  • South Halifax - this is where the projects are located, people with cars, avoid this area.
  • The Permastone - Mostly inhabited by stoners, they are mostly potheads and are generally harmless, unless provoked, then they will chase you like the living dead, until you give into their demands for more drugs.
  • Uniacke Square - This aspiring gated community boasts its own Recreation center and school. A modest police presence is maintained by dirty cops (level 6) to protect and serve.
  • John Hammond Road - In North Halifax, named after the owner of Jurassic Park
  • Gordie Howe Drive - Named after the famous NHL hockey player
  • Ronald MacDonald Bridge - One of two massive bridges, it features two golden arches on either side, owned by McDonald's.
  • Peter MacKay Bridge - Named after prominent politician Peter MacKay
  • Tim Hortons - Visit all 12 locations, roll up the rim to win.
  • Tic Tac Mall Named after the Tic Tac breathmints. Not to be confused with Tic-Tac-Toe Mall or Knick Knack Mall, this state of the art building is home to many fine reatil stores including "Centarama", and "Bluenoser Appeal"

Mainland Halifax[edit]

  • Crotchdale - they pride themselves in having "only twelve rape cases in 3 months" A local hotspot for anonymous sex.
  • Crayon Park
  • Biasedview - A rich part of town mostly inhabitated by conservatives.
  • Springfield - A rough neighbourhood ruled by one of the largest crime families in the city, the Simpsons.
  • Sack Vegas - A small town where the lower-middle class live only to escape into the shady nightlife. Drugs and prostitution rule the streets. What happens in Sack Vegas stays reasonably close to Halifax.
  • Meat Cove - Named after the Cape Breton town, this neighbourhood is the most inbred in the city
  • Bear's Lake - Another business district located just outside the city. Features resturants such as WrongWay and S&M as well as major stores such as Slave-Mart and Robbers.
  • Hammonds Plains - A road with some cows and houses. Off the road in giant subdivisions live rich pricks with BMW's.
  • Halifax Stanny International Airport - Many flights per day. Outside of the city.


Due to popular demand, the highly controversial decision to remove dartmouth from the game had been engaged. Known as the 'Dark-side', dartmouth is an unattractive part of the city where the less fortunate live, from the desolate shanty towns of cole harbour to the Mormon temples of Colby. The only thing that Dartmouth has going for it is the Magnificent view of Halifax.

Dartmouth was a naval town until the 1950's when they jumped ship and moved to the Halifax Dockyards.


  • Fred
  • An Ideal Bike
  • Army Issue MLVW
  • Dodge Viper
  • Smart Car
  • HRM Crown Victoria Police Cruiser
  • Metro Transit Bus
  • Harbour Hopper
  • The Homosexual runs every 15 mins between Dartmouth (Recently removed from the game) and the Magnificent Halifax Waterfront.
  • Theodore Tugboat
  • Honda Civic
  • Pontiac Trans Am
  • Dickey Dee Bike
  • Casino Taxi
  • Chevrolet Lumina
  • HRM Chevy SWAT Van
  • Chevrolet Impala
  • Toyota Echo
  • The Airporter
  • RCMP unmarked Pontiac GTO
  • RCMP unmarked Chevy Suburban
  • Peterbilt truck
  • Sea-king (Pay as you go Helicopter. Requires two week repair after use)
  • Mercury Topaz
  • Hummer H2
  • Chevrolet Chevette
  • Chevrolet Cavalier
  • Oldsmobile Alero
  • Lincoln Towncar Stretch Limosine
  • Acadia Lines Coach
  • HRM District School Board School Bus
  • Little Big Ray Ray's Fire Truck (only available after defeating Little Big Ray Ray in the 7th level)


89.9 Hal FM - Classic Rock[edit]

  1. Billy Idol - White Wedding
  2. ACDC - Dirty Deeds (done dirt cheap)
  3. Ozzy Osbourne - Mama I'm coming home
  4. Black Sabbath - Paranoid
  5. Van Halen - Chump
  6. ACDC - TNT
  7. The Rolling Stones - Start Me Up
  8. Five Man Electrical Band - Signs
  9. Loverboy - Working for the Weekend
  10. Foghat - Slow Ride
  11. Ozzy Osbourne - Crazy Train
  12. Rush - The Spirit Of Radio

97.5 WFNK - Funk[edit]

  1. Ohio Players - Fire
  2. Kool & the Gang - Jungle Boogie
  3. Parliament - Give up the Funk
  4. The Commodores - Brick House
  5. Cameo - Word Up
  6. James Brown - Funky Drummer
  7. Jimmy Castor Bunch - The Bertha Butt Boogie
  8. Isaac Hayes - Shaft
  9. Average White Band - Pick Up The Pieces
  10. Sly & the Family Stone - Dance to the Music
  11. Hot Chocolate - You Sexy Thing
  12. Rick James - Mary Jane
  13. Tiny Cat - n00b Squad

97.9 WDSC - Disco[edit]

  1. Bee Gees - Stayin' Alive
  2. Village People - Y.M.C.A.
  3. Gloria Gaynor - I Will Survive
  4. MFSB - TSOP
  5. Carol Douglas - Doctor's Orders
  6. Walter Murphy - A Fifth of Beethoven
  7. Boney M - Rivers of Babylon
  8. Gibson Brothers - Que Sera Mi Vida
  9. Baccara - Yes Sir, I Can Boogie
  10. Patrick Hernandez - Born to Be Alive
  11. Dschinghis Khan - Moskau
  12. Peter Griffin - Step By Step

Q104 - Rock[edit]

  1. Three Days Grace - I Hate Everything About You

See also[edit]

Grand Theft Auto
The Lost Games Lego Island | Cosmo | Poop City | Tatooine | Television City | Television City 2 | Television City 3 - The Wrath Of Dob
Grand Theft Auto III era III | San Andreas | San Andreas Stories
Grand Theft Auto: We're Running Out of Ideas era Hill Valley | Theft Under A Thousand | Beirut | New Orleans | Vatican City | Vatican City Stories | Antarctica | Somalia
Currently in Production Jerusalem | Norway | Philippines | Santiago
Non-canonical Grand Theft Audio | Grand Theft Election: Bush v. Gore