Grease

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“That F***'n Greaser stole my girlfriend”

~ A guy from the 50's on Sonny

“HEY! You's a cruisin' for a bruisin'”

~ Sonny on The above quote

“A Delightful little musicale!”

~ TIME magazine on Grease

“Uhh... Who's asking? AVADA KEDAVRAH!”

~ The Dark Lord Voldemort on Grease

“Mmm Mmm, baby cheeks”

~ Queen Latifah on Grease

Grease is a musical about working-class teen-mobs from the 50's who have AIDS. It is also interesting to note that the entire cast and crew of the movie were arrested for public nuisance after taking over the county circus to film the closing song "We Go Together" without the approval of the local Duke.

Plot[edit]

Danny, the protagonist of the story enters and is like "hey guys what's up." He has some friends, and then there are these girls in pink, they all enter school and are like whatever. So then this blond chick who likes the sand falls in love with Danny because his skin is pale, and cold. Everyone laughs at her though, and then sings about how summer loving is the best thing that can ever happen.

In the third act, Danny and Sandy meet the coach and have a three some, and then forget all about it because they were all date raped (including the Coach). Danny then finds Jesus Christ and starts singing about cars or some shit. Then he has a car, and Sandy likes him, and then doesn't like him. The bitchy girls in pink sings some more songs about how they're bitchy, and the other guys are like "what the fuck?"

After that they all are at Churchand begin to play a rousing game of twister, it is then that they know they fit together, with the last song of the movie, "We Fit Together," which won fourteen golden globes for being the best song of it's time. Danny falls back in love with Sandy, who then turns out to be black.

Characters (who matter)[edit]

  • Danny, an idiot. He is a vampire, member of the Ku Klux Klan and is severely obese (478 lbs)
  • Sandy, deceased
  • Rizzo, demised
  • Ken Nickie, dead
  • French-Fry, I'm tired of writing different words for 'dead' over and over again. Look, you already know what happened to her if you read the plot.
  • Sonny, father of 4, living comfortably on Sicily with millions of dollars.
  • Marty, wife of Sonny, mother of 4, living Happily on the island of Sicily

Subliminal Messaging[edit]

Grease was notoriously known for trying to conscript young people to various Cold War battles, including the Korean War, The Vietnam War, and the War in Iraq.

  • Every 5 seconds, a small blip in the image is a conscription poster of Uncle Sam
  • Countless Reference glorifying the Vietnam War and it's victory.
  • The finale, We Go Together, contains gibberish, which, played backwards and sped up, is telling people to hate the Soviet Union
  • Words are chosen which glorify American achievement.