Great Sushi Conspiracy
- Fact: JFK ate sushi at one point.
- Fact: Everything ever associated with JFK is a conspiracy.
- Fact: So then, sushi is a conspiracy.
- Fact: Japan has been a fish-eating people for thousands of years.
- Fact: Oscar Wilde doesn't care for trout.
- Fiction: J-Lo's spicy new relationship with Hulk Hogan
- Fact: Japanese people sometimes eat raw fish.
- Fact: That raw fish is sometimes called: sushi.
- Fact: Jerry Franklin was not at his home at the hour of 13:43 on the night of April forteenth.
- Fact: Jerry Franklin had a date.
- Fact: A Date with Destiny.
- Fiction: The feasability of hydrogen powered cars within ten years.
- Fact: Jerry Franklin left his home at precisely 13:22 to pick up a pizza.
- Fact: He ordered a pepperoni, extra cheese.
- Fact: The extra cheese was severely lacking.
- Fan Fiction: The Star Wars characters take a trip to the Orien system to face evil dopplegangers of themselves.
- Fact: On the way back to his house, Jerry Franklin drove behind Frank Jimmy for precisely twelve minutes on the interstate.
- Fact: Frank Jimmy had a date.
- Fact: A date: with Sara Fisher.
- Fact: Sara Fisher's last name has "fish " in it.
- Fact: She didn't like fish. She tended to gag at the sight of fish.
- Fact: Negligent of Sara Fisher's peculiar inclinations, Frank Jimmy took her for sushi.
- Fact: It wasn't pretty.
- Fact: Somebody forgot to tell Frank Jimmy about Sara Fisher's peculiar inclinations.
- Fact: That person, was JFK
- Admission: Writing in this format is getting tedious.
- Request: Can I please write this without the bullets and headings?
- Denial: Denied!
- Reluctant groan: Okay...
- Fact: JFK ate sushi later that night.
- Fact: JFK would later become president of the United States
- Fact: JFK was America's youngest president ever.
- Fact: JFK's brother was named Robert.
- Fact: Robert ate sushi on the same night that Frank Jimmy lost his girl.
- Coincidence?: I think not.
Perfectly Reasonable Conclusion
- Fact: Sushi's evil hold caused everything to go badly ever. Especially the above incident
|This page is or discusses a loony and/or nutty conspiracy theory of which Uncyclopedia vehemently denies knowledge and existence. The black helicopters are not ^on their way.|