Greater Tunguska Authority

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The Greater Tunguska Authority is rumoured to be a front for the ice cream van operations branch of the Illuminati. No real details, however, have been forthcoming, as the first rule of the Greater Tunguska Authority is that you don't talk about the Greater Tunguska Authority. An unanticipated effect of this policy is that they have great difficulty in recruiting new members.

The initiation ceremony of this organization was detailed in some length in Gerald Pascallini's seminal confessional autobiography, Mister Whippy Is Not My Friend. He describes the rituals involved, including "The Dance of the Flake," a potentially lethal stunt in which a giant flake is inserted into a novice's rectum, and "The Cornetto," which confirms in its bloodiness, goriness, gruesomeness, and nastyness that the reputation of this gang is well deserved.