Helicopter
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“Communists only fly a Mig.”
~ Comrade Faisal on Helicopters!
“They clearly do not exist.”
~ Oscar Wilde on Helicopters
“I will get into this Hind, (helicopter) now!”
~ Liquid Snake, from Metal Gear Solid, on Helicopters
“RUUUUUN! GOOOOOO! GET TO DA CHOPPAAAAAAAH!!!!”
~ Arnold Schwarzenegger on Helicopters
“Helicopters don't fly, they're just so ugly the earth repels them.”
~ Dan the Man V2 on Helicopters
“Helicopters are a conglomerate of parts going somewhere to crash. Your job as the pilot is to delay that crash as long as possible.”
~ Jim, Vietnam Helicopter Pilot on Helicopters
“In soviet russia choppa gets to YOU”
[edit] Helicopters
Helicopters (also known as Whirlycopters, retarded windmills, and, less commonly, "useful flying machines") do not exist. This is because they were obviously invented by a retard(Taylor Freisen) - no, not Leonardo Da Vinci - Michelangelo Antonionioni. They are an elaborate lie created by the battle pelican conspiracy in order to mask their own existence. Years ago, the grand pelican warlord Steven Seagal believed that the humans were becoming dangerously close to aware of the master pelican race and began to fill the world with helicopter propaganda in order to throw the humans off of the trail.
To any halfway intelligent human, however, it is obvious that helicopters do not, and cannot, exist. All one needs to come to this conclusion is a simple understanding of physics and the dynamics of flight. Flight is an illusion created by either a vigorous toss from a battle pelican (see: airplanes) or a complicated series of pulleys and levers, originally developed by David Blaine in 1776. The battle pelican theory however is heavily dependent on the shape of the object being thrown, and the use of a runway whereas the system developed by David Blane, clearly does not exist.
While the unexistence of the 'helicopter' is debated, a conversation in the U.N. resulted in a crashing of a chopper into the building killing many ambassadors and detonating the nuclear stockpile hidden underneath. The U.N have since been relocated to a small village outside of Zimbabwe.
Helicopter can refer to:
Helicopters may also mean:
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