Hide and Seek
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Hide and Seek is a popular sport played worldwide and is the national sport of Estonia.
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[edit] History
The sport was founded in 1903 by the Myles family in Bristol, England. The father of the family used to enjoy drinking when he came home from work and frequently used to get drunk and chase his six children around the home with a broken bottle.
To avoid the savage beatings of their father the children began to hide themselves around the house and thus the sport was born.
From those quaint beginnings the sport grew to worldwide popularity. The first league was founded in England in 1866 and the first world championships held one year afterwards.
fans packing into stadiums and players with multi-million pound contracts there's a growing concern that Hide and Seek has forgotten it's simple roots. With that in mind the Classic Hide and Seek Association was founded in 1999 where participants get drunk and chase their children with bottles to recreate a simpler time.
[edit] Safety Concerns
Hide and Seek is renowned as being one of the most dangerous sports on the planet. Despite calls for it to be banned it remains popular.
In the 1964 Olympics Russian Champion Vladamir Smirmoff was decapitated infront of a live audience. After that incident neck protection was added to the body armour and helmet already required by the regulations.
As of 1995 all players under the age of 18 are required to wear full facial protection.
[edit] Notable Players
- Anne Frank, record holder from 1942 until 1944
- Humphrey Spooner, record holder with 6 World Championship Victories.
- Edgar Poolhart, inventor the the much used "look behind you strategy" which won him the 1988 German Championships.
- Vladamir Smirmoff was tragically killed during the 1964 olypmics representing his country at Hide and Seek. His head was clean severed from his shoulders in front of a live audience and broadcast live in several countries around the world. He died in hospital three days later.On a positive note Vladamir's death caused safety standards in the sport to be increased.
- Osama Bin LadenHas held the title since 9/11/01.Even with the large reward for his find and the money spent trying to find him he has still kept hidden and is the one true champion. Some of his friends who have played with him have not been so fortunate, but put up good game.
- Jason Raval is the 2004 World Hide and Seek Champion and a missing person. He entered the playing arena and hid so well that he was never found. He holds the world Hide and Seek record of 5 years, 1 month and counting.
The contest was held on the 2nd of July 2004 in the Millenium Stadium, Cardiff. Jason and twelve other contestants entered the arena at the start of play at 7pm.
The last of the other contestants was found by the referee 42 minutes later under the stairs. Jason was then declared the winner but had hidden so well that he was never found and is still missing.
[edit] Consiparacy Theories
that Hide and Seek was originally played by Hide and Shiek,
the secret partners of Bonnie and Clyde.
Although the official story from the World Hide and Seek Governing Body (FUKA) is that he hid so well he was never found a number of consiparcy theories have sprung up.
Jason hid in a wardrobe that turned out to be a door to a magical fairy world where animals speak and is currently trying to overthrow the established monarchy there.
Some people (none of them scientists) propose that Jason spontaneously combusted.
Others theorise that maybe Jason put his name down on the entrants form but then never showed up to the competition, however these claims have been dismissed as "not very interesting".
[edit] Variations
Extreme Hide and Seek is widely accepted as the best variation of this beloved pastime. In recent years, the number of people playing Hide and Go Fuck Yourself has risen drastically. Hide and Go Fuck Yourself was originally demonstrated at the 1982 World Fair, and since then has become the favorite sport of the Union of Drunken Stepfathers. The end goal of the game can vary from meaningless tasks like "go bother your mother" to more extreme goals such as "drink the cleaning fluids from under the sink, but save some for your brother." This game is praised for its high level of challenge. More often than not, the Seekmaster General fails to find the Fugitives before the timer ends. Famous Seekmaster Generals have been quoted saying "Huh? Fugitives? Oh, the kids. Why didn't you just say 'the kids' the first god damn time? Get me a beer, woman." It is believed that alcohol may increase one's ability to find the children, although usually it just increases the strength of the Seekmaster General's backhand slaps.
[edit] Trivia
- Until 1992 the game had a time limit of six hours. The only professional game ever to reach that time limit without a winner was the 1979 Finnish Championships Semi-Final in which the referee was legally blind and failed to find three players who'd disguised themselves as lampshades.
- The phrase "hide and seek" is a palindrome.
- The worse a player is the more a sponsor will pay them to wear their logo as a bad player would be found more quickly and give their product more air time.
- George W Bush, Osama Bin Laden and Saddam Hussein all started a game of hide and seek in 2001 to which anyone could join before the end of the financial year. Bugs Bunny joined the hiding side, as did Alien Ant Farm and terrism. George Bush was the seeker, and has managed to find one person: Saddam Hussein. He has asked for assistance from the world to, "seek out terrism, and if you find it, erm, let someone know because it is a threat."
[edit] Hide and Seek in Popular Culture
- The game 'Counter-Strike' is loosely based off of hide and seek. The objective of counter strike is to hide for the entire game, however, the loser is the person who gets sick of hiding and finds others who are hiding.
