Hilary Swank

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search

Hilary Swank.jpg

Hilary Swank playing the role of Daniel LaRusso in The Karate Kid

Hilary Swank, best known for her transvestite role as Daniel LaRusso in the Karate Kid and her award winning performance as Merrick Jamison-Smythe in Buffy The Vampire Slayer, started her career in showbizz at the very bottom.


"I've always imagined my career as a mountainous everest and me, the eccentric mounaineer dominating the business till the air becomes thin," laughs Swank. She started acting at a very young age working as a Decoy Baby. From ages 5 to 10 she starred, along with her relatives and friends, in exclusive documentaries that were only seen privately by her family and loved ones until the camcorder was smashed. Two years later she started screaming at people randomly in the street until she was discovered by a female child-star agent Greg Smith who found Hilary mumbling to her self in a ditch one Halloween. "If you want to make it anywhere in this business you need to be man enough to take the pressure." Lacking penis, Hilary decided to audition for male roles in disguise and through this landed the role in Buffy the Vampire Slayer which continued to be remade into a popular fast food chain. Though she won an award for Best "Male" Performance her breakthrough role was along side Mr. Myagi in the Karate Kid. Ever since she has been landing quality parts and subtly destroying show-business brick by brick.