Illogicopedia is secretly stealing Uncyclopedia's users and articles! And unicycles!
Illogicopedia is the official encyclopedia of Illogicopedia, which has secretly been running all these years.  It is an insane repository of words put together in no particular order. We, the writers, editors, publishers, and megalomaniacal mad scientists hope that you will find our prose amusing, a word which here means; "Interesting for other people to look at and possibly even read, but which must under no circumstances prompt them to quack. Oh, and beware of the salmon moose, lest it moo your nose to the moon!" 
But, by any means, it is not required that your endless
baboons babbling be considered funny by anyone - neither objectively or subjectively - to qualify for inclusion. As you must have noticed by now, this is a place where not all is as it seems. Because nothing there is real, nothing there can be trusted. And, as they say, trust is power. Therefore, nothing there is powerful, and can be of great help if you ask nicely. Or something.
All of this is in great contrast to Uncyclopedia, a most dreadful realm of sanity and coherency, which, unlike nothing, does not come to your help regardless of how nicely you ask. Oh, the pain! The painful pain! The painfully painful pain!
Illogicopedia's General disclamer/"disco lamer"
|W E L C O M E to |
W I K I L A N D
Illogicopedia is in no way, shape or form:
- Sensible - Or sane, for that matter.
- Funny - Our site is not intended to be funny. We take nonsense seriously and so should you.
- Uncyclopedia - See "We are Not Funny".
- Against Uncyclopedia - Since Uncyclopedia is trying to be funny, and we are not, there can be no competition between the two sites, since their goals are entirely different.
- Pursuasive - Our site is not intended to convince you to believe anything.
- Mean - We do not host content that demeans or threatens people.
- Nasty - We do not host "nasty" content, such as graphic depictions or descriptions of sex, drugs and/or violence.
- True - parts may be, but please do not take it as gospel or use it for your homework, as you will be laughed out of the classroom. Fact!
- False - parts may be, but please do take it as gospel and use it for your homework, as you will be applauded out of the classroom. Fact!
- Your mum, no, surprisingly it's not - so Clean Up After Yourself!
- A suppository. (claims stating otherwise will be rectified)
- Real. (it was declared Integer)
- A website.
- Something, anything or nothing.
- ALLERGY WARNING: This website might have been in contact with peanuts.
- This website has an abestos warning. Do not use website without proper equipment.
- Should you get exposed to the fiberglass in this website, you are in trouble.
- Do not inhale this website, if you or a person inhales this website, quickly move the person to fresh air.
- This website has 600 calories, 46,124 grams of sugar, 99 vitamins and minerals, 89 grams sodium.
- All use must comply with the G.D.P. and G.W.B. as set out by the T.I.T. soon to become the P.M.P.D.G.
- You may not reinstall this software.
- By downloading this website, nuclear power, McDonald's, Google, sponsors, Third World countries, the monarchy, Ebay or Hull can be held responsible for computer failure, virus infection, meltdown, uranium enrichment, weight gain, porn found on search engines, heart failure, spending money, boredom, Civil war, meteor apocalypse, alien invasion, being ripped off or having a bad holiday.
- This website is intended for external use only; not to be taken rectally.
- This website may taste funny.
- Apply this website sparingly twice a day to the affected area for two weeks.
- Do not stop using this website unless advised to by your doctor.
- Should you have an allergic reaction to this website, stop using it immediately and seek medical help.
- Should this website come into contact with skin or eyes, rinse the area and seek medical attention.
- Always read the label.
- Always label the read.
- This website is
notthe elixir of life.
- Effects of this website may be subject to the placebo effect.
- Microwave this website at your own risk.
- Store this website in a cool, dry cupboard.
- This website is best served cold.
- No purchase necessary, prices without tax, however Canadian coins are not accepted.
- Websites are not tax deductible.
- One website fits all.
- Colours on website may fade if left in light.
- Smoking makes you look 'ard.
- Hand wash only, warm washes may cause the colour in the screen to fade.
- When using this website, do so in a well lit room, and do not sit too close to the screen.
- This is not a toy.
- White and dark websites cannot be washed together.
- Drinking while using this website is a criminal offence.
- You may not use this software, share it with anyone, edit it, redistribute it, talk about it to anyone, or even think of it.
- Illogicopedia, ?pedia and The Penguin Project disclaims any and all responsibility or liability for the accuracy, content, completeness, legality, regality, reliability, or operability or availability of information or material displayed in the ?pedia Service results. ?pedia disclaims any responsibility for the deletion, failure to store, miss delivery, or untimely delivery of any information or material.
- ?pedia disclaims any responsibility for any harm resulting from downloading or accessing any information or material on the Internet through the ?pedia Service.
- The Penguin Project reserves the right to modify, change, adjust, vary, alter, amend, exchange, swap, replace, substitute, trade, transform, convert, switch, regulate, fiddle with, correct, bend, tweak, revise, rework, rewrite, tinker, maintain, fine tune, tune, polish up, perfect, work on, improve, refine, hone, tighten up, round off, sharpen, enhance, make better, upgrade, raise or advance these terms and conditions under new circumstances, or not, as the the Penguin Project sees fit to do so, or not, or to be awkward.
- The ?pedia service is provided "as is", without any warranties whatsoever. If this website becomes corrupted it it your own fault, idiot; cruise the Internet looking for other losers like yourself. ?pedia expressly disclaims to the fullest extent permitted by law all express, implied, and statutory warranties, including, without limitation, the warranties of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, and non-infringement of proprietary rights. The Penguin Project disclaims any warranties regarding the security, reliability, timeliness, and performance of the ?pedia service. The Penguin Project disclaims any warranties for any information or advice obtained through the ?pedia service. The Penguin Project disclaims any warranties for services or goods received through or advertised on or advised by the ?pedia service or received through any links provided by the ?pedia service, as well as for any information or advice received through any links provided in the ?pedia service.
- All licences, including software, driving and alcohol, are property of ?pedia or their respected owners or not as the case may be.
- The Illogicopedia reserves the right to do anything.
- Night fever night fever! We know how to do it!
- Now, everybody do the congaaaaa!
Below are captions from Illogicopedia with reference to illogicopedia that make no real sense. Just pretend to laugh"
Quotes from people who think that Illogicopedia is the worst
I are sooo much bettah than you, for I says zoo! (timely exit due real keel over dead).
Yeah, fugnerfar... becks. Anyway. You suck. Encyclopedia Daemonica is the best. OMG OMG OMG! (tisk apishposh top nosh - pi). You need to broaden your shoulders wang i'm shocked and pointed without you.
I LIEK UR MOM. I haet yuur favver.
“Get your bacon rashers here! Get 'em while they're hot. Only 700 calories a slice and 55g grams of salt, not including seasoning.”
The official title of Illogicopedia in Illogiland is The place of bacon. On peut purchaser les bacons ici, mais pourquoi bullocksy crudd. Ca va.
Formerly the Place of cheese, the Place of rats and the Place of plates, Illogic rules. Do not question the authority of Fran E Dec.
Every second Eebleday of the month bacon is placed upon the Illogicopedia in a ceremony involving beef paste, 100 ravenous penguins and a flatulent binman.
- At least that's what the administrators claim. I reckon it's another cunning plan concocted by the evil superpowers that be to further oppress the Illogicopedia user. But hey, what do I know? I'm just a carbon based bean.
- actually, ignore that. Fluffy-spiel is henceforth prohibited!