International "Take a Scientologist to Work!" Day
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That shouldn't detract from the fact that the holiday commemorates a millennium of significant events in the development of human consciousness.
A chronology of events commemorated on this day
- 1021 - Sauron takes Xenu to work
- 1232 - Xenu takes Elrond Hubbard to work
- 1242 - Elrond Hubbard takes a jew to work
- 1497 - a jew takes Vasco da Gama to work
- 1500 - Vasco da Gama takes Catherine of Aragon to work and makes love to her in the office supply closet.
- 1508 - Catherine of Aragon gives birth to a black kid.
- 1520 - Catherine of Aragon takes her black kid to work on his 12th birthday.
- 1891 - a black guy takes Finis Jennings Dake to work
- 1911 - Finis Jennings Dake takes Old Mother Hubbard to work
- 1957 - Old Mother Hubbard takes Vinnie Barbarino to work.
- 1973 - Vinnie Barbarino takes Kirstie Alley to work.
- 1980 - Kirstie Alley takes Tom Cruise to work.
- 1985 - Tom Cruise takes Lisa Marie Presley to work.
- 1990 - Tom Cruise takes Jenna Elfman to work.
- 1992 - Tom Cruise takes Greta Van Susteren to work.
- 2004 - Tom Cruise takes Brooke Shields to work.
- 2005 - Tom Cruise takes Matt Lauer to work.
- 2006 - Tom Cruise wakes up from the dream in which he has friends.
- 2007 - an enraged mob attacks Tom Cruise and force feeds him 12 bottles of Paxil.
- 2008 - Someone takes Tom Cruise to work at a power plant and figures out how to create energy from Tom Cruise jumping on a couch. The entire United States gets power for eight years for free.
- 2009 - Tom Cruise divorces Katie Holmes and takes Oprah's sofa to work, dinner then a quicky round the back of Taco Belle.
- 2010 - Tom Cruise takes Tamia to work.
|This article forms part of the series on Scientology|
|Beliefs||Space Opera ~ Xenu ~ Thetans ~ The Sacred Movements of Goa Tse ~ Emo Hitler ~ Anonymous|
|Concepts||The Force ~ Clear ~ Hodgepodge (the hidden truth)|
|People||L. Ron Hubbard ~ Tom Cruise ~ Lestat de Lioncourt ~ Chef ~ Will Smith ~ Captain Caveman ~That Creepy Scientologist "Charity" Fund Collector Guy|
|Enemies||You ~ Me ~ Oprah ~ South Park ~ YTMND ~ 4chan ~ The Holiday Hawk ~ Walken! ~ Rick Astley ~ Pacman ~ Horses ~ Italians ~ Anonymous|