Interstate 10

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Interstate 10
Road
Part of the Jerry Seinfeld Interstate Highway System
Interstate
Length: 5000 miles (Not in Texan Miles)
Formed: Sand/Bones/Dirt/Asphalt
West End: SR-1, next to Santa Monicaaaa....
Major Junction: Too many.
East End: I-95 at Daniel Jacksonville

Interstate 10 (sometimes abbreviated to INSTA-10) is the south-most south-north-eastern-west Interstate in the United States of America and, illegally, in Texas. It stretches from the Pacific Ocean to the Atlantic Ocean, and thus is a very thin Interstate in the center Texas area, much to the dismay of Texan truck drivers.

Major Cities[edit]

According to results from the 1968 Rock, Paper, Scissors Competition, Louisiana controls this interstate and what it's major cities are. Due to a foreseen event, the New Orleans Interstate Control Corporation cannot access the Interstate system. Control of major cities has now moved to the Arizona Board of Illegalized Gambling.

Almost forgot, bolded cities are control cities. My bad!

Route Description[edit]

California[edit]

As almost everybody in California rides the Interstate 10 to go shopping, people have given this route a great number of names including (but not limited to), The Christopher Columbus Unnavigated Trans-national Interstate Highway, The Mexican Way (watch out for illegal immigrants), Veteran's Memorial Highway (WARNING, this section of Interstate is badly maintained), Bono Way, Doctor Daniel Jackson Stargate Interstate and Tons of Links Interstate Highway Linkage.

The law defining the Interstate is undefined, as the great Arnold Schwarzenegger could care less about it. Nonetheless, he tears the Interstate with his Hummer everyday.

Arizona[edit]

It's sand, lots and lots of sand. Pack up on gas and water or you're screwed. In Phoenix, prepare to spend six days sitting in traffic. Your car may or may not make it through this state in the same condition it was before it entered.

New Mexico[edit]

Nothing is to be found in New Mexico along the interstate, except a few shitty hotels, some abandoned teepees, and a helluva lot of Mexicans. If you are White, people will stare at you funny. Only one White person lives there, and she's a piece of white trash gal working at the Denny's in Deming who cliams that she was abandoned by her rich, California family on their way to Florida.

Texas[edit]

A simple section of Interstate in Texas.

The Interstate 10 going through Texas is considered quite 'simple to navigate' by the locals, though those from outside the Texas country will find themselves searching for a gun to shoot themselves. Luckily guns are easy to find in Texas along this Interstate. (Surprisingly, driving through Houston on I-10 is quite an enjoyable experience. Really. I promise.)

One section of the Texas interstate has 26 lanes, including 4 HOV lanes, 2 HOT lanes (for those with dang hot looks, many people from Texas are ineligible for using this lane) and 16 truck lanes (though most need to use 8 of them).

Truck stops are quite common along the Texas section of this Interstate. Expect to find the following at these stops:

  • 4 Shell Gas Stations
  • 2 Exxon Diesel Stations
  • 30 Coca-Cola Machines
  • 31 Pepsi Machines
  • 17 Dr. Pepper Machines (especially in Waco)
  • 2 Coca-Cola with lemon Machines
  • 3 Pepsi with lemon Machines
  • 4 Coca-Cola Black Machines
  • 5 Diet Pepsi Machines
  • 6 Coca-Cola with Cherry Machines
  • 7 Cherry Pepsi Machines
  • 1 Hobo

Louisiana[edit]

This man has obviously been to Mississippi, his skin even shows it.

Permanently Unavailable

Mississippi[edit]

Nothing notable here, though the odd toilet may appear on the side of the road.

Alabama[edit]

They are simple folk there in ole' Alabama, most of which will lead you through their simple state. But be forewarned, many will trick you with fine print contracts which will force you to file for bankruptcy.

By reading this page, you will give me all of your assets, sucker.

Florida[edit]

To accommodate incoming tourists, the lanes of the Interstate in Florida were increased to 47. Along with that, the number of ads for orange fruit stands increased by 500%, which also increased tourist suicide rates by 500%.

Notes[edit]

  • Many exits in Atlantis lead to nowhere. Then again, there's no way to access this part of Interstate anyways, so who cares.
  • In Texas, the Interstate speed limit is 100 mph. Might want to do out your will.
  • At various points on the Interstate, the grade can reach 10%. It is highly recommended by state officials that you pack a roller coaster car with you when travelling this section.
  • Mile 666 occurs in Houston, Texas. Talk about tough luck.

See Also[edit]

Interstate Highway marker Interstate Highways to as High as I can Count Interstate Highway marker
0 I000.png 1 I001-1.png 2 I002.png 3 I003.jpg 4 Interstate4.PNG 5 Interstate5.PNG 6 I006.png 7 I007i009.png 8 Interstate8.PNG 9 I007i009.png 10 Interstate10.PNG 11 I011.png 12 Interstate12.PNG 13 I013.png 14 I014.png 15 Interstate15.PNG 16 Interstate16.PNG 17 Interstate17.PNG 18 I018.png 19 Interstate19.PNG
20 I020.png 21 22 I022.png 23 24 I024.png 25 I025.png 26 I026.png 27 I027.png 28 29 I029.png 30 I030.png 31 32 33 I033.png 34 I034.png 35 I035.png 36 37 I037.png 38 80 39 I039.png
40 I040-1.png 41 I041.png 42 I042.png 43 I043.png 44 I044.png 45 I045.png 46 47 48 I048.png 49 I049.png 50 I050.png 51 I051.png 52 53 54 I054.png 55 I055.png 56 I056.png 57 I057.jpg 58 59 I059.png
60 I060.png 61 I061.png 62 63 64 I064.png 65 I065.png 66 I066.jpg 67 I067.png 68 69 I069.png 70 I070.png 71 72 73 74 75 I075.png 76 I076.png 77 I077.png 78 I078.png 79
80 I080.png 81 82 I082.png 83 84 85 I085.png 86 I086.png 87 88 89 90 I090.png 91 I091.png 92 93 94 I094.png 95 I95.PNG 96 I096.png 97 I097.png 98 99 I-99.svg
Higher than I can count  100 I100.png 101 102 I102.png 135 33 180 I180.png 238 476 I476.png 666 I666.png 678 777 I777.png 878 999 I999.png
The Outsiders  ? -1 In001.png IC-69 Ic069.png H-1 H-2 H-3 H-201 A-1 A-2 A-3 A-4 PRI-1 PRI-2 PRI-3
Lists  Main - Auxiliary - Suffixed - Business - Proposed - Unsigned
Gaps - Intrastate - Interstate standards - Replaced
Guide to the World
West: Santa Monica, California | Interstate 10 | East: Jacksonville, Florida
"Guide to the World" does not guarantee a perfect guide. You have been forewarned, so travel at your own risk, for dangerous animals could eat you alive, like that grue behind you. Have a nice day!"