Invader ZIM

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Invader Zim
Classification Irken
Position Ruler of Earth and the Pancake Empire
Weapon Pancake Technology
Loyalty Himself
The Tallest
Axis of Evil-Doers
cause of death of show SPONGEBOB SPONGEBOB SPONGEBOB!!!!!!!!!!!
In it for Crushing the filthy human piggy beasts!

If you were looking for the list of Invader Zim's incarnations (Zimii), see this page.


~ Gir on Oscar Wilde

“I was in the turkey all along! ME!”

~ Gir on the advanced political intrigue involved in being Emperor of the Earth


A former invader on his home planet of Irk, Zim was exiled by the Almighty Tallest for almost destroying his own home planet. His banishment sent him to Earth, a far out planet full of stupid, arrogant, and stupid bags of mostly water, called Humans, where he settled, unknown to the rest of Earth's population.

Zim first made himself known to the world when he assassinated Archduke Franz Ferdinand to trigger World War I and created the formula for New Coke soon after. When asked why he did this he simply said: “Your pathetic planet was boring me.” After triggering the First World War, crashing the stock market and giving Albert Einstein the idea for the Atomic Bomb, Zim was not seen publicly again till 2006 where he took over the planet from the reigns of George W. Bush. He ended The War Against Terror and created a dictatorship-economy based primarily on tasty, tasty dookie. Zim, according to his publicist Gir, went on a holiday with the ‘Piggies’. He returned a few days later and flew to the moon on a rocket made of flaming cheese. He discovered that the moon was, in fact, made of Cheetos.

The ruler of earth and his shady bodyguards, Almighty Tallest Red and Almighty Tallest Purple.

It is rumored that Zim is actually an expiremental government piece of shit that was created by a race of giant radioactive rubber pants. When asked about these rumors, Zim dismissed them as "LIES!!! FILTHY LIES!!!" and had the Irken Fleet sweep Wyoming. FUN FACT: You just lost The Game. Sucks for you. (That is so fucking cheap!)((Damnit!! I lost!!))

Vice Invader[edit]

You are being hypnotized by Lord Zim. The process should take only a couple of seconds . . .

The Vice Invader of Earth is a really retarded robot named Gir, who in some ways is also related to Oscar Wilde, not to be confused with the much more retarded puppet that Zim himself replaced during the invasion. GIR has proven to be a better leader than many ants say. He established the First Schools of Kitten Huffing and Mite Sniffing, and is currently the co-dictator and publicist of the Zim Regime of Doom. However, Gir is facing a major threat to his job from Minimoose. It is also believed in some areas that GIR is simply the Tourettes Guy in disguise. You Found a secret!

Other Projects[edit]

During Zim's reign on earth, he got into "wire-tapping".

“Noooooo! My beautiful baaaaase!”

~ Zim

Zim has also been the main financial influence behind various boy bands and other related music. His support was possibly one of his most insidious ideas, as it was thought to drive all humans to suicide. This was unfortunately not the case. Gir however had a brief but passionate affair with three piggies at a Boy Zone concert. Justin Timberlake is believed to be an evolved version of the monkey that was used by Zim in his earlier attacks. In addition to boy band funding, Zim and Gir teamed up to beat Hitler's Zepplin in the 1337 Olympics held in Kenya, Africa. he also brutally murdered Barney and won 1,337 Awards.

Cartoon Lies[edit]

Zim doing his daily work-out routine
A wanted poster that Zim posted in order to find Dib and Vasquez.

Several years prior to Zim's conquest of Earth in 2006, his ingenious scheme for invasion was discovered by an intrepid human boy known only as Dib. After a light lunch of crackers and milk, Dib devised a plan to expose Zim and protect mankind. For this purpose, he enlisted the aid of renowned historian and journalist Jhonen Vasquez (best known for his works depicting the early life of famed composer Johnny "Homicidal Maniac" C.) to produce a series of documentaries in animated form "to appeal to the younger, hip teenage demographic." These programs attracted the attention of the international community, but with the opposite result from what Dib and Vasquez had intended; the public embraced Zim as a genius and a sex symbol, and hordes of "Zim fangirls" gathered in front of Dib's house to beat him with colorful plushies and mock his freakishly huge monster head. As a result, Dib was forced to flee to Guam, where he is living out his days as a monkey wrangler. Then, Zim, Dib, and Tickle-me-Emo married some weird emo-goth fangirl for publicity. It worked like a charm.

The Cast of the series that Dib and Vasquez created.

Despite the overwhelmingly positive response to the "Invader Zim" documentary cartoon show, Zim himself became enraged with its existence and did everything he could to cause its removal from television. "It is spreading filthy lies and making me look stupid!" he commented to one source, "I am not stupid! I am very...the opposite...of... you are stupid!!" Eventually, he captured its co-creator Vasquez and, on pain of tickle-torture, forced him to enter into a contract signing all rights to the show over to demons. In addition, Zim built an evil robot, named it Herb Scannel, and, after assassinating the beloved king of Nickelodeon, Marc Summers, instated it in his place. Soon after that, although it remained among the highest rated television programs in history, "Invader Zim" was cancelled. Vasquez has never been heard from again, but there is some evidence that he has been hanging upside-down from the ceiling of Zim's Palace of Doom since 2006.

Shortly after conquering Earth, Zim ordered all recordings of the show destroyed, including all VHS tapes recorded straight from TV by nerds using their dad's VCRs. Although it is rumored that episodes of the cartoon are available on the internet, in reality all versions to be found online are complete fakes, and bad people are only trying to trick you, children. A 3 volume, 6 disc DVD set purported to contain all 20-something finished episodes of "Invader Zim" have been sold by bootleggers in alleyways and out of car trunks, and at Hot Topic. but everyone who has bought them has ended up dead. (Except Doris.) Something about a ring.


“What's the "g" stand for?”

~ Zim on Gir

“I'm so very alive, and full of goo...mission goo!”

~ Zim on himself


~ Gir on Master zimii...and waffles


~ Gir on waffles...again

“Do you want to wake up the entire planet?”

~ Zim on Gir

“I dooo.”

~ Gir on World

“Gaz! Taste me, I'm delicious!”

~ DIB on on GaDr

“That thar Zim's a little twerp!”

~ John Wayne on Invader Zim

“Who dares soil my normal boy head with this...pork cow???”

~ Zim on a muffin

“That's a stinkin' muffin!”

~ a random kid on a muffin


~ Bobbykins on Invader Zim

“Oh yeah zim we stopped ZADR that is a gay cult”


~ the Atomic Tank on Invader Zim

“I will pass probing day like a slorbeez passes her young: JIGGLY... AND FULL OF JUICE!! ”

~ Zim on The Tallest

“I want to watch the scary monkey show!”

~ Gir on scary monkey show


~ Zim using piggies to destroy Dib's past


Invader Zim is one of the biggest influences on Goth and Emo culture, next to The Nightmare Before Christmas. It is a common accessory and seen on many emo's Myspace pages, despite the fact the invader zim show is not gothic or emo in anyway. But Zim's human bride is both Goth and Emo. She is a fan of his show. She gave birth to his spawn. She REALLY likes chicken. A LOT.

External Links[edit]

See Also[edit]


The Host of Zimii.
Fear them, and obey them!
If you are confused about which one you want, it's probably Invader Zim
Invader Zim:The original villian himself! Dim-witted, blue, and weird: Bizarro Zim
Cyborg Zim: He's back and wants revenge! A concert of doom!:Metal Zim
Chocolate Zim: Good enough for you to eat. Rigging irken elections:Republican Zim
Audio Zim: such a wonderful voice. Loved by millions of fangirls:Gay Zim