# Irrational numbers

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“I had an irrational number once...bitch said she was a virgin.”

Irrational numbers are numbers who psychiatric patients frequently tend to rationalize into existence. This does not prove their existence, however, and one who believes in them is believing in mere myth. These numbers are known to be the Female version of normal numbers. fact

#### Case 1[edit]

The number 0 is not a number. You ever see that one movie about the mexican kids and how they're all trying to act cool and the teacher is like "I'm teaching you Calculus this year" and that one kid is like "I invented zero, bitch."? Well, imagine how hard it would be to do math with no zero. Think about it. You couldn't get past, like, ten. That means the Greeks and the Romans were just pissing off when all this time we believed they actually invented complex mathematical equations that could go to some really really high numbers. Not without a zero, buddy. The numbers weren't what was "high" in this case.

#### Case 2[edit]

There is no evidence to prove the existence of 1. Nothing. No equation. No formula. No proof. No theorem. Nothing. NOTHING. So don't go on about how you're a math genius now that you can count past one, because you CAN'T. Look at this:

Two plus two = one number An apple and an orange = one group of fruit 3/4 of a pie and 5/8 of a pie = one messed up pile of pie .3 and .6 = one kind of number

Take into account this "one" that you weakly justify as an all encompassing "whole" and you'll see that it never truly is one. A pie, for example, is composed of countless bajillions of atoms, which form molecules that make up the crust and fruity filling. You have ONE pie, you say? WRONG! What happens when a crumb falls off the crust? Are you going to say "I have 99567872733/99567872734 pie" now that a crumb fell off? Obviously not, dumbass, because your primitive human mind could not possibly count that high or calculate to that level of precision. Therefore, you are DOOMED to not know the answer.

- Q: "Johnny gave me one apple, Susy gave me three apples, how many apples do I have?"
- A: "I don't fucking know! Do you actually expect me to analyze every last atom in an electron microscope for you?"

- Q: "I can count from zero to one! Look at me!"
- A: Wrong again. Nobody can count to one. Try it. You'll never get there. 0.00000000001, 0.00000000002, 0.00000000003, 0.00000000004, etc. Even if you did this, you'd be skipping infinite amounts of points on the number line. Why don't you count those spaces of infinity? Because your feeble human mind will ultimately fail! That is why you "skip" to one so lazily, assuming that it will be there for you from the long, cold journey from 0 to 1. It will not. It is a poor man's estimate. Whose to say 1 is even at 1? You're going to arbitrarily place a marker somewhere along the line to infinity, and call it 1? Are you insane? Are you completely out of your flipping mind? You can't do it! And you won't do it. So don't even bother.

Believers in Quantum Physics say that 0 CAN in fact jump straight to 1. This is, of course, bullshit.

#### Infinity[edit]

Now there's a number to be proud of. Unfortunately, you can't count to it either. It goes way way way way WAY beyond your limited capacity for reasoning. In fact, that's all you are, limited. Limited life span, limited attention span, limited brain capacity. Inferior at every step of the way. And don't even think of adding infinity to infinity, subtracting infinity from infinity, multiplying infinity, or any other such nonsense. That's what kindergardeners do. It's immature. The fact is that the largest number that is rational and not irrational varies, for example, for comparing times (like is she/he late or not?) the largest number that is not irrational is 5.85349273925*10^1546.

**Glossary of mathematical terms**