Jhonen Vasquez

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Jhonen Vasquez
Jhonen Vasquez
Date of birth: The Beginning of Time
Place of birth: Anywhere
Nationality: Mexican/Polish/German/Alien
Known for JTMM, Read!, I Feel Sick, Invader Zim, inventing sex & the porto-potty
Occupation He doesn't want you to know.
Religion Buddhist
Spouse Disemboweled
Children All murdered

Jhonen Vasquez is an inspiring cartoonist for many children around the globe, for many have picked up his work after seeing the infamous series Invader Zim. He is currently working on Unknown Movie Project.


Jhonen's Projects and Other[edit]

Mindless Self Indulgence: An incredible band that graciously allowed Jhonen to work with them for a while by designing some of their album covers.

Jhonen's works have been deemed by Adults to be inappropriate for children. But they are wrong, his works are both entertaining and educational. Observe.

Jhonen and his pal Roman Dirge

Johnny The Mathematical Maniac[edit]

Jhonen's first published work. JTMM, as it is called by the fans, is a delightful story of a man named Johnny C. who brings people to his house and tortures them until they get the right answer to the math question he asks them. If they get it wrong, he takes all of the numbers out of their brains and spreads them on his wall. He needs to keep numbers on the wall, for behind his wall lies the answer to all math questions, so then the world wouldn't need to use math. He has a charming next-door neighbor named Todd who loves reading, but doesn't like math, so Johnny tries to help him with his troubles. Todd often just whispers 'read' in terror and backs/runs/sprints/swims away when confronted by Johnny's horrid lessons among other things, which gave him the nickname "Squee".

Squee![edit]

Jhonen, being a Mexican.

Squee! is a spin-off about little Todd as he takes the reader through some magical adventures in reading. Watch as he reads a funeral book for a dog, and you read the Bible with him while at the Devil's house. Great fun for all. However, the 'final' chapter, wherein Todd's flagrantly negligent mother and father commit him into an insane asylum, for fear that he might actually write something about them one day, was actually the next to last chapter. In the actual final chapter, Todd is helped by both Pepito the Anti-Christ and Johnny C. (who was exiting the Defective Head Meat Institute during Todd's arrival, having been there for nightmares about 2s in binary code sequences) in a spectacular escape from the asylum, contacts the local Child Services authorities to finally arrest his inhumanly bitter father and constantly doped-up mother for their gross abuse, and moves in with Johnny, whom he finally accepts as an older brother figure (but still hates his math obsession). Due to the unnaturally optimistic note in the end of this work, considering his others usually end horribly and often involve evisceration, Jhonen's publishers demanded that he write out the final chapter, which he grudgingly did so after a series of persuasive bitch-slaps.

I Feel Sick[edit]

I Feel Sick is about Johnny's one time girlfriend Devi, and her gay lover with ADHD Teena.

Invader Zim[edit]

Jhonen right before choking to death by his pet fish who fell in his glass of water.

Invader Zim was Jhonen's first television project. It was meant to expose the evil plans of Irken reject Zim who was planning to annihilate the human race. Good show; gets better as they go on though.

Worries[edit]

There were some worries about when Zim was going to get into Sex Education, but that was later calmed when Jhonen revealed that Irkens didn't use sex to reproduce. Though Jhonen is famous for being a Sex God, this does not concern how Irkens reproduce.


Jhonen FACT: [[In a NYC Con Pod Cast in 2007, Jhonen was asked by a loving fan, "What did you do for money?"

Which Jhonen replied with, "Well, there was this corner..."

[the panel crowd laughs nervously]

"...Yeah, and if you wore short enough pants; people like skinny guys!"

So you know he must have some amazing Sex God abilities!!]]

Zim's Death[edit]

Eventually, Zim was canceled, and nobody knew why they would get rid of the lovable alien and his meddling dog. Sources tell us that there were three reasons: One, Nickelodeon never really advertised the schedules for Zim, and the show didn't get that good ratings, and two, Jhonen was tired of working on it because he was ripped of creative freedom(Jhonen got tired of Nickelodeon getting tired of Jhonen's bitching), and three, a retarded Cartoonist named Butch Hartman beat the shit out of Jhonen in a parking lot and forced him to cancel his show, so he can allow Hartman to air more Fairly Oddparents episodes. But alas, Zim still lives on in our hearts, forever.

Unknown Movie Project[edit]

Jhonen has announced that he is both scripting and directing a movie called Unknown Movie Project. Little known details. Later sources indicate that his movie was Repo! The Genetic Opera, a crazy barf-bag musical.

Fanbase[edit]

Jhonen has a giant blood cumming Goth fanbase made up of Teens. In spite of the fact some of his fans are actually hot and willing, he does not try having sex with them by any means. It's not sanitary, so he is indeed very wise; passing up sex with AIDS ridden minors.

Jhonen's Death[edit]

Jhonen Vasquez died from choking on a pet fish who accidently fell into his glass of water. Afterwards he gritted his teeth since he was in pain and put his right hand over his neck as he broke the empty glass with his bare left hand. Reports of Jhonen explodin' in beams of light are yet to be confirmed. Apprently reports of him being seen at places such as McMeaty's and Crazy Taco have been filed, but no futher evidence has been found at this time.


See Also[edit]