Jive
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
“What the fuck is this shit?”
~ Oscar Wilde on Jive.
“Quit jiivin Turkey, Ya gotta Sass it!”
~ George W Bush on On Jiivin.
[edit] Hiztory
Jive rapin' be derived fum ye olde Jive dialect knode as Jive. It started out as French but den de French discovered it and started usin' it fo' demselves, den de Africans gots confused upside de subject matta' of every conversashun dey had wid de crazy french Empuh'o' Chow Zang Wonton. 'S coo', bro. In 1688 de phrase Jive turkey wuz some popular terminology dat meant some sucka wuz actin' crazy. Slap mah fro!
Sir Albert Einstein aka "Funktipus" wuz well knode fo' bein' some Jive turkey and in 34BC he wuz defeated in gladiato'ial combat by some dude called Newton. Dey fought upside a dispute as t'which one uh dem invented gravity fust, it wuz lata' discovereddat neida' of dem had invented gravity but some small joker from nan tucket had whup'en dem t'it. Man! Howeva' right befo'e Einstein wuz defeated he discovered some madematical fo'mula fo' derivin' jive
Dey is tuo dialects o' de jive: "Yeeeaaaahh", and, "Rasta-adda-oodle-adda-ouh". De first knode jive t'was speek'd by de $0.50's posse, nd is severe mumbleng. De latter dwas spoken by de south>north emigrants who speek'd it perfectly fluent Englis, which is de 'modulated' with 'ooh-aadda-ooh' vowel expresse. Also, certain co'nsonants ( like de letter 't' ) are omitted. EX: "I's a Democra_, I lives in Manha__an, and I vo_ed for Preside__ Clin_on." None o dems 't's is pronounced.
[edit] Maths
X + sin32 / 4.7t3(84 − xt + wsinA) = Ewk / 100 * 0.5w =Jive
[edit] Hoopball
De Jive fo'mula wuz particularly useful in de process uh choosin' groups uh foe sucka's fo' playin' de hoopball, dese groups wuz often called foursomes. Wen dey use de Jive de wrong wei it make de bad baad tings come to me breda!
