The UK's leading philanthopist on random and largely uninteresting information.
John established himself quickly as a depository for information long deemed to be non-entertaining, with his seminal and thought provoking topic "They've discovered Jack The Ripper's ghost haunting London - but how do they know it's him?"
What makes this master of the obselete so unique, is the sheer volume at which he delivers his facts. That people might not hear his anecdotes and snippets of information isn't lost on dear John - he'll raise his voice in a manner not unlike a student standing at a bar trying to prove his wit/intelligence/ability to talk loudly in an appropriate situation.
John is also a master conversationalist... with himself. Whether it be a light debate on whether to have a plate of Yorkshire Puddings, a Wonka Bar ("It's Not the Best Bar in the World"), or testing the Digestive biscuits for Sweetmeal, John can hold up a queue just as mightily as the Man of Steel, Superman, holds aloft a coachload of terrified citizens before putting them safely back on the bridge.