Kuwait
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“The laziest country in the world!”
~ Oscar Wilde on touring offices across Kuwait
“Oh my god! Oil is cheaper than bottled water in Kuwait!”
~ Fat ass American on gas prices in Kuwait
“I'm going to have Kuwait roasted!”
~ Saddam Hussein on revealing his dinner plans
“Democracy is bull-shit”
~ Ruling al-Sabah family on Kuwait's political future
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| Motto: USA! USA! USA! | |||||
| Anthem: "Star-Spangled Turban" | |||||
| Capital | Poo-Wait Shitty (Population: 5 Arabs) | ||||
| Largest city | US Base (Population: 5 Million American Troops) | ||||
| Official languages | Muslimist, American | ||||
| Government | Puppet Government | ||||
| National Hero(es) | Papa and Dubya Bush | ||||
| Declaration | |||||
| Currency | Oil, a Delicacy among Americans | ||||
| Religion | {{{religion}}} | ||||
| Population | Arabs: | ||||
During the 1920's, King Geoffery of Cornwall sent a group of explorers to map the deserts of the Middle East. These men found what is now known as Kuwait (Pronounced "Q-ATE, unless you're American, then it'e KWAIT)
Kuwait was largely uninhabited, but there were a few tribes living a nomadic life in the desert.
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[edit] History
In 1956, the British and Bolivian governments agreed to split Kuwait and take half each. The Bolivians took the southern half which is now known as Saudi Arabia. The British got what we now know as Kuwait. In 1961, there was an uprising by the local tribesmen. This became known as the 1-Day War and the British lost control of the country.
[edit] OIL.. I'VE FOUND BLOODY OIL!
These were the words spoken as Shakira (The Prime Minister of Kuwait at the time) announced to parliament the discovery of oil under Kuwait. It was 1984 and the recent discovery was to change life for all Kuwaitis.
Kuwait is now estimated to be floating on approximately 97% of the worlds extra virgin olive oil. This is sold throughout the world to consumers for approximately US$980 a barrel.
[edit] "I'm rich, bitch!"
Kuwaitis are said to boast the highest annual average personal income in the world, thus Americans (if they ever want to) should move to Kuwait to take in menial labor jobs.
: "What's so funehhhhhhh?"
[edit] Peaoples
Peoples in Kuwaiti have big variety on nationality. 75% of people working in oil-business, are Arabic women. While 55% of people working in the city are Indians & Pakistanis, 99% of people working in desert are Americans.
[edit] Economy
The economy of Kuwait is largely based upon exports of olive oil to the New York Mafia. There are however, some manufacturing company successes in Kuwait. The most famous of these is the "Kuwait Sand Company" who supply sand to the building industry in Europe.
[edit] Climate
Kuwait is excessively hot during the winter months, with temperatures reaching 70 degrees celcius. However, this drops to minus 20 during the last two weeks of July each year. Little is known about this dramatic drop in temperature, but it is now believed by some to be a result of Global Cooling.
[edit] The Future
Kuwait's future looks uncertain. As the oil is drained from beneath, the country is slowly sinking. Current estimates predict that by 2009, Kuwait will sink below sea level. Although this will prove disastrous for the country's oil business, it should not impact too much for the sand industry. A spokesman for the Kuwait Sand Company recently commented, "It's alright mate - we'll just have to roll our trousers up" Indeed.
| Middle East Countries |
| Bahrain | Cyprus | Egypt | Gaza Strip | Iraq | Iran | Israel | Jordan | Kuwait | Lebanon | Oman | Qatar | Saudi Arabia | Syria | Turkey | United Arab Emirates | Yemen |