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“I love this place. I go there during the winter holidays.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Ibeiza
Locals are often amused when tourists shrink from the drunk and disorderly behaviour exibited by notable inhabitants.

Lapland is a northern province of Finland and generally regarded as the least dense of all the Finlands. Lapland was first settled by a small group of hunter-gatherers that dropped out of the main group traveling to Sweden. The cold tundra and pointy top made hunting difficult and the future Laplanders settled in to focus on gathering.

Once unpacked they embarked on an ambitious election and government building program, leaving the gathering for the weekends. As their numbers dwindled from the lack of food more and more time was spent on succession and mid-term election laws.

The resulting constitution and statues were 1657 single spaced, double sided pages. Nearly two thirds of the surviving 324 gatherers were employed by the government in the form of semi-presidential system and quarter-congressional system. Thirty more Laplanders were involved with the civil and criminal jurisdiction and administrative courts known as Community Justice. The rest of the population went back to a 40 hour gathering week but were unable to provide enough for the rest and their numbers dwindled to a point where travel writer Rick Steves was appointed titular total minister.


259 million years ago Lapland was part of the Finger lakes area of New York. Due to continental drift, and another night of a seemingly endless Todd Rungren concert tour it slipped up over the top of the world. Once it reached the peak it picked up speed and jammed deep into Northern Europe.

Santa Claus[edit]

Santas origins are unclear but he seems to have been a printer who grew rich off of the governments printing needs. It also seems to have been the first chief executive of Community Justice. Its history is debated by experts but unfortunately much of the physical evidence has been destroyed by vandals deflowering the "Santa Dome." Others assert it was stolen from Iceland amidst the mass chaos of the Narwhal Revolt, instigated by the blind, legless English. Although Iceland quickly rose up and drove England's creativity and remaining magic into the farthest regions of Greenland and Siberia, they failed to see the few hulking Laplanders slinking into the ocean with a large red sack bobbing against the icebergs.