Leroy & Stitch

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia think they have an article about Leroy & Stitch.

Leroy & Stitch was a movie so brilliant, so cunning, so heartwarming, that it caused peoples brains to explode and make their body fail. It was also the most anticipated family film.

History[edit]

This movie was created so Disney could bring more fans into their grasp, causing a rise in profits and fame. The movie was released on March 31, 2010, after numerous delays caused by the war between Disney and M1cR0s0ft. The plan was, unfortunately, a success and drove millions to rush to their nearest pet stores and purchase butt-ugly daschunds with cobalt blue fur.

Plot[edit]

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For a while, no one has figured out the plot because after 1 second of watching the movie, their DVD players would explode. At the time, only Disney Execs know what the plot is. Recently, however, one person has came up. He is one of the few people who immediately left Hollywood in the minute before it was destroyed after the movie aired in its premiere (See more on the subject). He describes the plot as follows:

The movie opens with Grand Councilwoman rewarding Lilo and her friends for recapturing and repurposing all the other experiments. They were rewarded in such a way that they would have to be separated from each other. At first they denied these rewards, but then decide to agree to them when the mailman keeps bothering her friends. Before they went, Lilo gave them souvenirs: Jumba gets a video tape of Family Guy, Pleakley gets a Boogie Bass, and Stitch gets an "I scored with a human" t-shirt.

Meanwhile, Gantu decides to bust Dr. Hämsterviel out of jail, and leaves his gay lover, Experiment 625, behind. Gantu and Hämsterviel then go down to Jumba's crib and tell him to make a new experiment. Jumba complies, and Leroy is created. Stitch busts in and quarrels with the villains, and when Pleakley pops up to say "Hi", he, Jumba, and Stitch are all trapped in the Starship Titanic and send it heading to an iceberg in space.

Meanwhile, Lilo misses Stitch, and decides to call him up. She heads to Gantu's ship and encounters 625, singing like mad about breaking up with Gantu. Lilo, moved by his song, decides to name him Ruben Studdard. Lilo then tries to contact Stitch, but she gets Leroy instead. Leroy then teleports to Gantu's ship and claims he's Stitch. Then Lilo realises that Leroy isn't wearing the "I scored with a human" t-shirt Stitch gave him. Upset, Leroy ran outside. In revenge, he decides to kidnap all of the other experiments.

Back on the Starship Titanic, Pleakley's Boogie Bass is not helping the ship divert from the iceberg. As the Boogie Bass continues to sing about himself and spout one-liners about not being dusted, Stitch pounds on the ship's console in frustration. This causes the ship to shift slightly higher, bouncing harmlessly off the iceberg. Meanwhile, Lilo and Ruben Studdard hot-rod Gantu's ship and went to the Galactic Federation, where it has been taken over by Hämsterviel and clones of Leroy that were created shortly after the original. Gantu is reunited with Ruben Studdard, and when Hämsterviel realises that they are gay, he verbally insults Gantu, saying that he did not want a homosexual henchman. He then sends the clones at Lilo, Gantu, and Ruben Studdard, but the Starship Titanic arrives and rescues them.

Meanwhile, Leroy has kidnapped each and every experiment, while also capturing Leeroy Jenkins due to their similar names, and also various members of PETA and the Atlantanic Convention. He brings them all to a wide clearing, where Hämsterviel's ship arrives. As the ship prepares to have the living members slaughtered, Stitch arrives and ties all its weaponry into knots, preventing them from being fired. The Leroy clones are sent after the experiments, resulting in one large game of Chess. During the game, Jumba remembers that he is playing the Family Guy tape when he created Leroy, and if he and the clones see such a display again, they will commit suicide. This leads to Stitch reenacting the scene where Peter Griffin hurts his knee on the sidewalk. When all of the Leroys see this, they proceed to kill themselves. In the end, Jumba, Pleakley, and Stitch decide to stay on Earth to film nonsense, and Gantu and Ruben Studdard flew off on their ship to do typical homosexual things.

The film ends with Lilo's biggest smooch with Stitch.

Technology[edit]

The technology they used is called the DisneyEngine. The engine was created especially for this Disney movie that could render everything in real time using a powerful system. The DVD would tap into the DVD player and push the hardware to high limits until it overheated. The technology was put onto the Leroy & Stitch DVD to test out if the engine worked.

Criticism[edit]

During the opening night's screening of Leroy & Stitch, 1 minute after the film was aired, The electronics malfunctioned and the theater exploded wiping out all of Hollywood. After the incident was over, Town officials inspected the city and concluded that it was a terrorist attack. Hollywood is currently in the process of recreation.

Some critics' statements about the movie:

“Noooooo!!! Why did they did this to you???”

~ The New York Times on Leroy & Stitch

“This is complete crap. First of all, This has nothing to do with the Lilo & Stitch Trilogy. Second of all, it featured Leeroy Jenkins which has nothing to do with the movie. Third, My friend died in the explosion, I am seriously thinking about killing you Michael Eisner!!!”

~ The Boston Tribune on Leroy & Stitch

“I wanted my son to see this, so I hired a babysitter to see it with him at the premiere. Shortly after the theater exploded. I am so MAD at you now Disney!”

~ Parenting.com on Leroy & Stitch

“We now mourn the death of our friends who went to see this movie. They perished in the explosion hoping that they could see a movie about romance, drama, and suspense.”

~ SF Chronicle on Leroy & Stitch

“The movie sucked and my friend perished in the explosion, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

~ MovieFone.com on Leroy & Stitch

“Wait, was it Lilo or Leroy? I'm confused. Who was it?”

~ Oscar Wilde on Leroy & Stitch

“Bumomomo? Bu, bumo... Bumomomomo, bumo bumomo!”

~ Yellow Devil on Leroy & Stitch

“I can't believe the guys at Disney were stupid enough not to test this feature thoroughly enough to prevent explosions! Smooth move, TERRORISTS.”

~ Jeb Bush on Leroy & Stitch

“Hey Brian, this is nothing compared to the time I went back to the future with Doc Brown.”

~ Peter Griffin on Leroy & Stitch

“I didn't get to watch it for a while b-b-b-because the tubes were to tied up, pre-p-perventing me from receiving my internet.”

~ Ted Stevens on Leroy & Stitch

“Why, Disney? Why?! I thought we had something!”

~ Indiana Jones on Leroy & Stitch

“Excellent idea. I need to try this on Bart Simpson.”

~ Sideshow Bob on Leroy & Stitch

After the DVD was released, 98.12% of the people complained that once they pushed play, their DVD players would explode causing many house bringdowns, 100% of the people complained that once they put the movie onto their iPod, it caused it to emit radiation; causing all their electronic devices to explode in a raising fire. Disney has currently burned all the complaints as they are too busy counting money to care. Disney was charged $780,230,000 by the grand court for their DVD's causing the DVD player to explode the house. Disney was bought out by M1cR0s0ft on April 11, 2010 after the DVD incident. M1cR0s0ft eliminated the Disney name and renamed all things by Disney to M1cR0s0ft and even renamed Disneyland to M1cR0s0ftLand and after that, M1cR0s0ft paid to have the name Disney banned from existence. After M1cR0s0ft bought Disney, they took the DVD off of store shelves and burned all the copies of it. Quarantine prevented further items from entering the country; people caught doing so would immediately be put on "Death Row".

Controversity[edit]

Unfortunately, the DVD contained deleted scenes that showed exploitative content and 3 sex scenes, 1 with 627 & Angel, 1 with Stitch, Angel, and Nani; and 1 with Lilo & Leroy. This was unchecked in the MPAA's rating check. They disabled it in the preview copy so they could get it onto store selves, The retail version has the sex scenes enabled. This caused parents to complain that they do not want their children watching this stuff, and they also said that they didn't want to live in the streets. Disney also included a virus that would connect onto the local network to gather up personal info and replace security software with dummy programs. The virus would then send the data to disney so they can take all their money. Top Virus Companys went bankrupt trying to figure out how to fix the Virus. The MPAA demanded that they pay them $10,000,000 for virus making. But the virus deleted everything about the MPAA and the MPAA was no more after that.

Bringing back the film into existence[edit]

Despite the problems, in 2013, a group of teenagers, along with PETA have decided to fund the restoration of this film - making it less likely to harm the person and to cause a house fire - resulting in a loss of half the human population and an infection of half of PETA's team with Alien Experiment Rabies. Luckily, the film is now released freely around the globe. Upon restoring the film, these quotes were found throughout the footage...

“"Do we have to eat him? No no no wait, we don't have to eat him. Let's swallow him whole!".”

~ Dr. Jaques von Hamsterviel - Birth of Leroy, Leroy & Stitch

“"Run boy! He's got a taste for meat now!!!!!!"”

~ Richter - chess battle scene, Leroy & Stitch

“This is WHY I need a gun.”

~ Angel - chess battle scene, Leroy & Stitch

“OH I GIVE UP! I need a surplus of ARSENIC! SOMEONE PLEASE!!”

~ Leroy clone - suicide scene, Leroy & Stitch


Miscellaneous[edit]

On the subject of Alien Experiment Rabies, This film has also been reported on carrying a disease, which became widespread all across the globe, even infecting those in Australia and New Zealand. It was similar to the rabies virus, only it is not spread by a bite of an infected animal. This disease is solemnly known as "Rabid Leroy/Mad Leroy disease". Symptoms include:

> Foaming at the mouth

> Growling, barking or other stupid animal noises (characteristic of such alien experiments)

> Running around in circles, rolling on the floor.

> Paralysis at 24 to 36 hours, victim keeps foaming at the mouth and dies after 'drowning' in own saliva.

During the conflict, if such a person complains of a headache after they have survived viewing "Leroy & Stitch", he/she may have been infected with Mad Leroy/Rabid Leroy disease. The best thing to do is to notify police/medical authorities immediately if onset of symptoms occur. There is no cure and the person infected with the disease (not showing any symptoms) would have to be euthanized, and those showing symptoms would have to be shot dead, euthanized, then shot again.

For several reasons, disease is one of the reasons why "Leroy & Stitch" is not released in Australia.