Lil Wayne
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“Always talk to God. Never listen to cops.”
~ Lil Wayne on his song The Bob is Hot
“Real hip-hop.”
~ White people on Lil Wayne
Lilly Way Neyagawa, more commonly known as Lil Wack-ass Faggot-ass Bitch-who-can't-rap-for-shit, was born February 29th, about 2,000 years ago. He is claimed as the first rapper ever. Formerly a member of the rap group the Hoe Boys, he joined the Cash Monkey Records collective on his 1982th birthday.
Summary of his long long rap career is like this:
- 62: Debut album Tha Bob is Hot releases.
- 263: Second album My Penis Curves 500 Degrees! releases.
- 666: Third album Becoming Christian releases.
- 701: Arrested for raping a famous singer Marry Juanna. He was sentenced to 1300 years and one day in prison.
- 1432: Tried to escape from jail using Tunnel Network.
- 1998: Started community work to shorten the imprisonment. He worked to collect illegal Auto Tune pills.
- 1999: Officialy released from jail.
- 2000: Fourth album Rebirth releases.
- 2007: Fifth album The Carter IV releases without introductions of I, II and III.
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[edit] Early Career
Lil Wayne started rap career in AD 62. One of the famoust songs he recorded on that time is "Jeezo", a song celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ. Several critics praised the song as his "lyricism debut", because his rap was generally talking about homosexual behaviors. Notable lines from the song are:
Ok we popping champaigne like Jew got champion Moses
Looks like we got Palestine, the championship land
Cuz he got hard balls, and bitch he got dicksuckas
He aint the Birdman, he is Jesus Christ
In an interview with Jerusalem Timez magazine, Lil Wayne revealed that one of his favorite religions from childhood to be Jew, and cites them as a major influence in his music. In his songs there are several lines assume his belief on one God. For instance, "Always talk to God / Never listen to cops" from his anti heterosexuality song "Tha Bob is Hot". On the other point, many songs from his debut album The Bob is Hot such as "Large Pipes", "I Want War", and "Enemy Turks", have common adlibs - Mayim mayim mayim mayim, hey, you bitch ass son - on the intro and outro. This shows his new type of hip-hop music inspired from Jewish music culture. Bill O Reilly, an American famous black music critic, applaused the album with its "religious wordplay and plenty of entertaining, left-field ideas". He added on the last as "the best joint ever, which comes once in 2000 years".
[edit] Tha Bob is Hot
Tha Bob is Hot is the debut album released on GOOK (Gangsta Of Organised Kikes) Music Records by the rapper Lil Wayne. He was only 15 at the time. Since there was no education system established on that age, Lil Wayne couldn't write/hear/speak/shout/rap the proper language. Hence Lil Wayne himself doesn't appear much on the verse, but on the intro: he shouts any words he learned on his English word class. For instance, "I want Moon E!! It points, Moon, and, EARTH! ice du Graitestzzz!!! LUL MAH M&E LONG!!! M.O.N.E Tha VERB!! LOLOLOLOL its da Knee Gear!!! I LUFF TEH ADMINZ AND MAH MUMMA SEDZZ IM TEH FUNNIEST LITLE KID TEEEVER!@!!!!@ I LIKE RUSTI SPOONS!!!"
Although Lil Wayne himself doesnt confirm what did he meant to speak, some rapper thought the word "Mon-E" indicates "Money" and the word "Knee Gear" indicates "Nigger". This became the trigger of new hip-hop style which talks about money and nigger mainly.
[edit] Music Career
Lil Wanker is a native of Pen island.Lil Wayne began his career under the name of Big Chris. Big Chris was much less the lyrical genius that we know today. His tour 'Big Chrissy Style' was grossly overshadowed by a similar tour from Will Smith which featured a much more hilarious name. After a brief trial period with Dexy's Midnight Runners, Big Chris composed a series of successful Motets, which were plagerized by Guns 'n' Roses and Big Chris, yet again, found himself sucking off the algae growing from Benjamin Disraeli's kneecap. Big Chris' breakthough came about through a meeting with a fellow Jedi, Lil Salisbury. The two formed a comedy duet and became and immediate hit in Zimbabwe. Following the trend of comedy duets at the time, Lil Salisbury successfully applied for a knighthood, leaving his previous title for Big Chris. Chris seized the opportunity and became Lil Chris. During an extended sexual encounter with Phil Jupitus, a vision of Clive Anderson told Lil Chris to change his name to Lil Wayne, because 'Lil Wayney Style' had the hilarity factor. He did, but his hilarious never followed-through He also sucked off birdman (brrrrr)...Many times again and again He also married Tori Smith who lives in bermuda and then lived happily ever after. the end
[edit] Arrested
[edit] Modern Career
Lil Wayne is known known for his bad rap songs, annoying high voice (see:high school girl), and infamous song "Every Girl". His songs are relatively unknown to people outside of the race of black. But Wayne is progressing to the genre of rock. To which he reportedly said "Then I F**k every emo gurl in da world". His associates percieve him as a disgrace to human society, but keep close to him with the hopes of making a hit song with him and making lots of money see:america.
[edit] Zoo Fans
The high majority of Mr. Wayne's fans come from 1 of 2 groups. White teenagers or black people who were molested by gay priests.
[edit] Niglets
I have heard from rumors that him and Sarah Palin had a baby in 1995 had gay triplets the jonas brothers my friend david has went to every concert and has seen Lil Wanker and janet supporting their bands
[edit] Controversy
There is much controversy surrounding the man we know as Lil Wayne. For starters, most people cant understand what the fuck hes saying half of the time, and the other half of the time he sounds like hes getting his balls twisted when he raps. Next to this there is also the criticism for his lyrics which dont connect and make absolutely no sense. Most hardcore fans, as you read about above, will tell you that The Fireman is the FUCKIN man because he can rap about anything. Apparently anything also includes comparing yourself to Hitler:"Like Hitler, it's the New Orleans Nightmare" Anything can also include talking about assasination and Martin Luther King in the same rhyme: "When you're great, it's not murder, it's assassinate / So assassinate me, bitch / Cause I'm doing the same shit Martin Luther King did." Anything may also include making absolutely no sense whatsoever when talking about your muscles (ie. Douche Bag):"My biceps and triceps is ass". Last but not least, anything can include comparing beating his meat to the Rodney king riots while getting the basis of why the rodney king riots started completely wrong: "Then I beat it like a cop / Rodney King, baby, yeah I beat it like a cop / Beat it like a cop! Rodney King baby said I beat it like a cop!" As you can see, comparing yourself to Hitler as well as MLK and talking about beating your meat by comparing your actions to the 1992 Rodney King riots does not exactly garner positive reviews. Many people are also very angry about the word of a new rock album by Lil Wayne. The first single, "Prom Queen", was released to extremely polarized reviews, because the song including one of the most extremely awful lines such as "Yes I'm a Prom Queen, Prom Queen/Prom Queen, Prom Queen remember me!/Prom Queen, Porn Queen, yo!/Porn Queen, yes I'm a Porn Queen". Love it or hate it, either way the whole song sounds like a crackhead whining like a bitch.
[edit] Rock Album
So far we have only spoken about Lil Wayne's rap career. Now let's go to the most recent breakthrough in Lil Wayne's creative passions, Rock and Roll. Lil Wayne decided during one of his weed induced euphoric stupors that, "I wanna be a rock star, like Johnny Cash and shit." This quote comes from and unspecified source at a party. After stating this the idea really stick with him and he used a small fraction of his ridiculous amount of undeserved money to buy a guitar. With just 3 lessons Lil Wayne was playing like a pro and, "tearin' up the fretboard." The new album is called Rebirth, refering to the musical rebirth that Lil Wayne is experiencing right now. When other rock stars were questioned on the subject of Lil Wayne joining there ranks, very negative reviews were received. One rock star who asked to stay off the record was quoted as saying, "I'm Ozzy Fucking Ozbourne, I'm a real rock star, who is this Lil Wayne character anyway?"
[edit] Reborn
Reborn is an upcoming Christian rap album by Lil Wank. It will probably go platinum, or in this case, GOLDEN HATAZ HAAHA, within two minutes of being on the shelf of your local Wal-Mart.
[edit] The Syrup
One thing people have wondered for generations is What is Little Wayne's fave drink of all time. The answer is his special syrup. Cough medicine mixed with jolly ranchers and sprite. So yes in some ways Wayne is still a little boy at heart. He sometimes refers to this as "Purple Drank". As you can see this is another common Weezy F. Baby spelling and grammatical error. He claims that he is not addicted to his syrup because it gives him stomach aches and migraines. When he was later asked why he smoked so much marijuana he responded by saying, "cuz it helps these stomach aches and migraines i get after drinking syrup." Hmmmmm, what a dumbass
[edit] Tha Carter IV
Tha Carter IV will be released November 2010 and will feature Lil Wang using gay fucked up sounds. Really, it will just be his mouth doing the sounds (see "The Syrup" above). The video will be him getting his "lollipop" getting licked by Jim Jones. It should also be noted that he will release a limited edition skin flute for faggy teenage wiggas who give Wayne his undeserved "cashmoneyz!!!!!"
[edit] Track listing
- She Loves my Yellow Underwear!
- I Ain't Pop, Bitchz
- Hahaha I Gotta Lil Wang
- Pop Pills
- Popsicle
- Cardiac Arrest (ft. Fat Joe)
- Ugly Man (50 Cent diss)
- Yeahhhh
- Weed Take ya Mind off the Syrup
- I Can't Sleep!
- Autotunin' (ft. T-Pain & Kanye West)
- Hidin' in Daddy's Closet (ft. R-Kelly)
- My Kite (ft. The Game)
- Chocolate Heart Attack Milkshake from Hellz YEAHHH!!!! (ft. Ronald MC Donald)
- I Ain't Got no Money, I Got the Cashmoneyz!!!
- I'm You (You is Me Bitch)
- Always Scrapped (feat. Bird, Birdman, Birdguy & Birdy Boy)
- Monkey Make Me Cum freestyle
The clozesss!!! biatch!!
[edit] See also
- Autotune - Lil Wanker's favorite drug which makes his voice retarded alot
