Lime

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A lime, not to be mistaken for its evil yellow enemy, the lemon, is a green, ovalish fruit that vaguely resembles a lemon. It is grown on trees and commonly used for some things ... like lemon lime drinks. Note that a lime only can be eaten by a Norwegian russ 2009 for example Sigbjoern from Norway, Lene cannot eat a lime because she eats the lime too slow...!

[edit] History of Lime

The lime was initially cultivated in 736 B.C. by a Greek who became disgusted with the only drink they were allowed to have, other than water, Olivade: an 'Ade made from olives. He believed Lemonade had a more exquisite taste than the olive oil's 'Ade and wanted to replicate the sugary and lemony drink without steeling the Phoenician's recipe. He hence changed the recipe by creating limeade. The Greek drink was so tasty that it eventually gained in popularity until the lime became a fruit growing on trees, not simply vines. The lime then became remarkably similar to the lemon (how many fruits 'really' grow on trees?), and the Phoenicians accused the Greeks of copyright fraud.

The Greeks retaliated by changing the lime, giving it a green hue. The rest is political.

After living peacefully with the Greeks for several years,lime was kidnapped by pirates. At first lime resented the pirates, but soon learned that they had a pretty sweet deal. Lime got to stay below deck and chill while the pirates did their "High seas robbery" thing and then got to party with all the hottest wenches while on land. Lime soon became the life of the party with the invention of Tequila body shots. Lime also enjoyed being able to travel to Caribbean islands, which is where it originally got it on with coconut. In return for such luxuries, lime provided the pirates with a cure for scurvy, which had made the pirate dating scene way harsh.

Philosopholis Thompson once used a lime to torture his enemies by squeezing the juice into their eyes, then sucking there eyes out and replacing them with the lime skins, before chucking them in a giant blender with limes and making a lime and enemy smoothie, which he would sell to McDonalds.

[edit] Uses

If chemically altered, a lime can turn into the ferocious Sabre-toothed lime.

Like all other citrus fruits, limes are extraordinarily less lucrative than truffles but more nutritious. Limes are currently used in such dishes as:

  • key lime pie
  • lime flavoured peanuts
  • lime flavoured potato chips
  • lime flavoured lemons (good taking over evil)
  • lime flavoured fruitloops (the green circles)
  • limestones
  • Lays
  • lime flavoured limes
  • lime flavoured fruit


As well as these, limes can be used for many other purposes, such as making bombs, and throwing at science teachers.

[edit] Lime proverbs

Although not many lime proverbs are known, it's relative the blond bimbo the Lemon has stolen one of it's greatest, which originally went When life gives you limes, you're sitting under a lime tree.


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