Lubos Motl

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Lubos Motl, Harvard physics professor extraordinaire.

Luboš Motl was born in Czechoslovakia on 5 December 1973 and is a 5-times Nobel Prize winning genius string theorist and amateur journalist at Harvard University. He has authored or co-authored 23 papers related to string theory and is also an expert on global warming, sexism, political incorrectness, kama sutra and peter woit.

Allegations about Luboš' Lorentzian behavior[edit]

Luboš' name was allegedly Laird Karmann before The Onion publicised his exploitations of women that could be explained away (together with extra dimensions, spin-2 gravitons, supersymmetric partners, the multiverse, the cosmic landscape of string theory and untestable Planck scale speculations) by his superstringy "theory of everything". [1]

According to the allegations: "Surely, anyone can see that, mathematically, the universe is composed of Riemann surfaces, having positive-definite metrics, across which the attached 'loops' or free 'strings' have a (1+1) dynamic topology," Karmann said. "But string behaviors are Lorentzian, meaning that they—like me—need an intense dual-phase Wick rotation now and then just to stay in rational space. I mean, it was just a blowjob." [2]

As a result of this Lorentzian behavior of Luboš, he is allegedly being ousted from his stringy research at Harvard. [3]

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