Machine guns

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“They're nice and soft to the touch. But is depends on where you touch them.”

~ Micheal Jackson on machine guns

“The tools of MoreHammered”

~ Bin Laden (the 'O') on machine guns

“In Soviet Russia, machine guns kill YOU!!”

~ Russian Reversal on machine guns

“That's what they're meant to do.”

~ Passer by on Russian Reversal on machine guns

A furry rodent living in the black hole that is the center of Afghanistan.

Explodes on impact and when touched by water. Is of both genders, yet has one single reproductive -PENIS!-... no, organ. -ORGASM!- Bob if you could stop interrupting, go back to the deepest and darkest corner of my imagination I'm trying to take over uncyclopedia and use it as a blog for my own purpo...


Problems with Rain in Afghanistan[edit]

When it rains over the black hole, which it does a lot due to the long clouds with the knobs at one end being attracted to the black hole, there is a complete and utter chaos. This chaos is caused by a Runescape n00b mining to much rune essence, using his chaos talisman and forgetting to mend the hole in the bottom of his backpack. This, in turn, creates a domino effect. Someone random rolls 3 6's with 3 dice, a ginormous trapdoor opens up, everything falls screaming into the pit of lava at the bottom, the trapdoor closes and then falls into the pit of lava itself after its cheap, plastic, made in china hinges break. After that minor change happens and a single technical difficulty is repaired the machine guns, upon contact with the rain, start rusting revealing the explosive inside them. I once got a bit too close and died. The explosive then creates a sound like Zeeky Boogy Doog and explodes in an explosion as explosive as a highly explosive explosive.

Life cycle[edit]

Fashioned and forged by ancient and now fugitive dwarves of the Mines of Moria now flooded and commonly called Mars. Made with the same quality of products made in china. Then in its first stage it grows a pin-trigger (not pictured). Next it grows a magazine and its trigger grows longer. A head starts growing and the trigger is at its max. Sold to terrorists through blackbay for non existent amounts of fake cash. Shoved into a forge which extends all the way to Mars.

Life cycle.JPG


sex with other guns

How to tell the different sexes apart[edit]

There can be only one.

How it eats[edit]

It doesn’t.

What is its habitat[edit]

I told you before! Afghanistan!


None. I’m getting sick of this animal species template so this is the end of IAMCON'S PERSONILISED TOUR OF MACHINE GUNS!!!!!1!!!


Look, I’m not even going to write anything here.


Or here.


Nor here.


Finally, the end!