Madagascar

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Repoblikan'i Madagasikara
Malagasy Republic
Madagascar
National Flag South Africa's new goat of arms
Flag Coat of Arms
Motto: "Ports Closed"
Anthem: "Fahafahana Mafia"
111180px-LaGuerreAMadagascarmap.jpg
Capital Andavadoaka
Largest city Fivondronampokontany
Official language(s) Malagasy
French
English
Government Firaisan'ny Skotisma eto Madagasikara
Presidentissio Karl Marc Ravalomanana
National Hero(es) Tintin, King Julien, and Captain Hook
Declaration
 of Independence
1960 from the Greater German Empire
Currency iraimbilanja
Religion Wicca.
Population /dʒɛnˈdɑrməriː/, or /ˌʒɑndɑrməˈriː/
maréchaussée not enough
Bouncywikilogo10.gif
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Madagascar.

Madagascar (pronounced ma-duh-GAS-kur) is a possible country located near Africa. Some believe it is only a myth, some claim they have seen this lonely Island in the Indian Ocean, but is it real? Scientists are struggling to find proof that Madagascar exists. It is said to be home to animals like the spider monkey, tarantula, and many exotic birds, including penguins. Some say that it could be the only island with much rainforest, and it could be the last hope for exotic animal's habitats. Of course, there is no living proof that Madagascar exists, but can experts prove it wrong?

I mean, shoot, have YOUUUUU ever been there? Can YOUUUUU prove it exists? Huh? Then, nor will we believe it until we see it. Then, again, what does existence mean? What is the meaning of life? Does anyone really know what time it is? Does anyone really care...a-bout time? So I can't imagine why, whoa no!

Madagascar Wrestling

Those who claim to have been to Madagascar say the Madagascarians (Madagascars? Madagascaroids?) have their own unique version of professional wrestling. They use a two-sided ring and fans sit on the floor, as chairs are a luxury over there. The wrestlers perform high-flying moves like the Spaceman Tornesial Armdrag, 360 degree flips over the top rope and double reverse ninja kicks with an atomic hog drop.

Pandemic Paranoia?

After the controversial "kill-all-humans" game 'Pandemic 2' was released, rumor has spread that a simple man coughing in Brazil can lead to a total seal-off of the island. The three main arguments challenging that fact are:

1. "WTF?!? President Madagascar would never do such a thing!" This is easily dismissed, as we have proof: Pandemic 2 Madagascar.gif

2. "Madagascarians are immortal. Therefore they have no need to shut down the island." This is true. However, they also like to ANNOY THE CRAP OUTTA EVERYONE, so they still shut down their island so that diseases trying to infect them don't realise that their efforts are useless and eventually go Bat Fuck Insane. They also don't want regular people (and Wikipedia readers) to know this. But now... Uncyclopedia knows. We are onto you... Well, I am. You killed the rest of us.

3. "So what? Madagascar doesn't exist anyway!" Those who bring this one on the table are swiftly directed to the next section.

Madagascar; Fiction or F'Real?

Most sightings of Madagascar are from sailors sailing along the Eastern coast of Africa, but experts believe that the sailors could have been drunk, or seeing a mirage. It is usually sighted when the moon is full.

Famous Sightings

  • July 2nd, 1936; group of witnesses immigrating to the US on a ship called the Susanna coming from the harbor town Beira, Mozambique, sighted the shore of an island not normally seen. Spectators say the island was 12-16 miles away, and was lined with lush rainforests. First reported sighting of Madagascar.
  • May 15th, 1948; lone sailor, whose ship was destroyed in a harsh storm, claims a strong current brought him to an uncharted island, where he lived off of the natural resources and fruits found in the forest. He eventually made a sailboat from dead trees and leaves and sailed to Maputo. First of Madagascar's many close encounters of the third kind.
  • June, 2005 2003; on a transcontinental flight from Phoenix to Washington, D.C., United flight 1025 showed the movie Madagascar. Now, one has to wonder...why would they make a movie about Madagascar if it, in fact, does not exist? Ever thought of that, Mr. Smarty pants?

The Movies

During the 2000's, the creators of Shrek made two movies about this land known as Madagascar, which they claim to have "made the name up". Further forensic investigations will reveal whether the nation really exists or not.

All hell broke loose after Bob Saget signed up to do a voice of a zoo animal. Nobody cares which animal Saget was, because HE SUCKS!!!

After this movie, they made another one, Escape 2 Africa, which involved the deportation of American animals to the distant land known as Africa. The reason for their deportation is not clear, however most agree that they were sick of Madagascar.

A documentary, known as Madagascar 4: The Movie, The Video Game, The Second Movie, The Second Movie's Video Game, and The Documentary, hit theaters in January 2013 and made from the guys that brought you MysteryQuest. History Channel, now knowing that the world still existed and the 2012 thing was fake, they decided to capitalize on the "Madagascar Myth" and sailed the african seas. The movie is available in retail! Buy it and find out if Madagascar is real or a myth! I am not telling you!

Madagascar's Ports

Many people have been questioning if Madagascar has closed their ports. While we don't know ourselves, this site may answer the question.