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Did you know...
- ...that this topless woman is clearly unhappy about her situation? (pictured)
- ...that abstinence is only 99.999% effective?
- ...that you can get great deals on Vietnamese clothing imports if you buy now?
- ...that packets of silica gel that say "DO NOT EAT" on them are actually delicious?
- ...that cats only pretend not to like to swim?
- ...and that they like it even more while inside a burlap sack?
- ...that you have probably broken at least three of the Ten Commandments just by visiting this website?
- ...that the Virgin Birth is no longer considered a miracle? Women have been giving birth to virgins for centuries!
In the news
- Life as orphans better than life in America says Russia.
On this day...
August 31: Anniversary of Rob Zombie's first Halloween
- 69 BC - John Carpenter is born
- 320 A.D. - Knives invented by Leonardo Da Vinci.
- 540 A.D. - Greeks invent the holiday of Halloween, because they were bored and had nothing else to do.
- 1958 - Jamie Lee Curtis is born.
- 1963 - Mike Myers (the comedian-actor) is born, much to the amusement of horror fans.
- 1964 - The Beatles write an early version of "Help!" featuring lyrics such as "It was the boogeyman?/As a matter of fact, it was/He's not human/Shot him six times!" However, Paul couldn't find anything to rhyme with "boogeyman."
- 1965 - Rob Zombie is born.
- 1966 - The Rolling Stones write an early version of "Paint It Black" with the sole lyric "Black isn't a color."
- 1966 - Randy Bachman removes the lyrics "These are the eyes of a psychopath" from the Guess Who hit "These Eyes."
- 1978 - The original Halloween movie is released; people become terrified of the wrong Mike Myers.
- 1980 - Some little slasher-horror movie with some dumb holiday name is released. The killer is some chick with a son named Jacob or something like that.
- 1989 - Mike Myers joins the cast of Saturday Night Live, as Michael Myers rushes out another sequel, Halloween 5.
- 1990 - Michael Myers disappears from pop culture radar. Meanwhile, Mike Myers' career begins to take off.
- 1995 - Michael Myers is back with a vengeance as Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers is released to little fanfare. Donald Pleasence dies and is replaced by a talking dog.
- 1997 - Princess Diana dies in a drink driving incident, while trying to engage in a spit roast in the back of a Mercedes, in Paris, France
- 1998 - Halloween H20: Twenty Years Later saves the Halloween franchise.
- 2002 - The Halloween franchise is nearly killed by Busta Rhymes in Halloween: Resurrection.
- 2006 - Rob Zombie announces that he is remaking Halloween.
- 2007 - Rob Zombie's masterpiece, Halloween, is released and grosses more money than Mr. Bean, Balls of Fury, Superbad, Titanic II, and Transformers combined.
- 2009 - Audience flock to see The Final Destination and Taking Woodstock instead of Halloween II
Oh my god! There are no more days left! It's today or miss the boat to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month, GET VOTING!!
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