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Did you know...
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- ...that no, doing this does not make your incompetence any less obvious? (pictured)
- ...that compromise is a great diplomatic tool?
- ...although on an international level, a nuclear arsenal is even better?
- ...that sheep shrink when it rains?
- ...that the White House is really off-white?
- ...that to the untrained ear, John Aglethorpe's Ode to the Monotony of Life may simply sound like one continuous, monotonous tone, but the song is actually composed mostly of alterations between the A sharp and B flat notes tied together?
- ...that Oscar Mayer has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A?
- ...that Godot isn't coming?
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In the news
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On this day...
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March 31: Condom Appreciation Day
 you spent how much on balsa wood condoms? - 4000 B.C. - Babylonians create the first wooden condoms, resulting in much fewer unexpected pregnancies and many, many, many more splinter-related injuries.
- 1865 - The modern condom is introduced, consisting of sheep stomach lining coated with sulfuric acid. It is quixotically not well received.
- 1939 - With the invention of latex, the modern modern condom is introduced, single handedly ending the Great Depression.
- 1958 - Condoms are mentioned on television for the first time, in an episode of The Flintstones entitled Put It Back In.
- 1970 - National No-Condom decade kicks off at Studio 69 in New York City.
- 1986 - AIDS becomes all the rage. Condom sales increase tenfold.
- 2009 - The Pope claims that condoms would increase the number of people with AIDS in sub-Saharan Africa, in a similar manner to how exercise is unhealthy and cheeseburgers eat people.
- 2010 - World's first condom-themed birthday party!
- 2020 - Robotic condoms are invented.
- 2030 - Robotic condoms, sick and tired of copulating with the female genitals turn gay!
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