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Selected anniversaries

February 17: International Gay, Lesbian, Transexual and Bisexual (GATTICA) Day.

  • 28 BC - Jesus informs his disciples that he's gay. They all laugh at his little joke and proceed to gangbang Mary Magdelene.
  • 29 BC - Mary Magdeline is found in a dark room with lipstick all over her face, abusing herself in a mirror.
  • 2001 - HAL 9000, a homophobic computer, attempts to kill two gay dudes on a spaceship. Hilarity ensues.
  • 2004 - People named Gaylord are rapidly asked if they have ever watched the television show "Gaylords say no". Most say no.
  • 2006 - You finally forget about your miserable Valentine's Day, only to be tormented by this reminder.
  • 2008 - USA bombs some country because one of its citizens made some USA guy get STDS.
  • 2009 - Rabbit ears are officially obsolete in America. By law, lagomorphs across the nation must upgrade to sonar.
  • 2009 - John Prescott is violently molested by a fanatical Pavarotti obsessive
  • 2009 - John Prescott is discovered at the corner of downing street in a corset and fish-net tights attempting to whore himself out to passing single parents. He is quickly put back on tranquilisers, ceasing all higher brain functions and allowing normal command of the country to resume
  • 2019 - Denmark is officially recognised as a mistake and erased from history
  • 2040 - all world languages are revoked and replaced with American, a language consisting soley of words with one syllable or less
  • 3010 - Iraq War resolved to the saisfaction of all thanks to the complete absence of Iraq.

Archived Anniversaries


Today's soup of the day is
osprey
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In the news


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More Current Events at UnNews News


Did you know...

  • ...that multiple sclerosis isn't as much fun as it sounds?

Do you care...

  • ...that you can always pay your credit card bills using your credit card?


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Waiter and Chef of the Month

Writer of the month.png
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward.png
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared.png
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
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The news source on crack
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The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
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Where noisy things can live and prosper
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Another way to waste time
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Instructions and guides for anything and everything
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Content-free books
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Useless misquotes galore
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If it makes sense, we don't want it
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Poetry for people who hate poetry
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Debating all the irrelevant issues
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We can ruin stage and film too
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Don't make me explain it to you twice
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We'll tell you why things suck
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Broken media repository


Uncyclopedia Languages

The original Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains just under 30,000 articles. This mirror Uncyclopedia contains 46,119 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
United Kingdom
Uncyclopedia
English
United Kingdom
30649
Desciclopédia
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Brazil
35457
アンサイクロペディア
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16220
Nonsensopedia
Polski
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Wikia 20323
Nonciclopedia
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Italy
Wikia 12328
Italy
France
Désencyclopédie
Français
France
Wikia 7257
Inciclopedia
Español
Spain
Wikia 8775
偽基百科
正體中文
Taiwan
5328
Uncyclopedia.de
Deutsch
Germany
Wikia 5520
Hikipedia
Suomi
Finland
6804
Finland
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on August 12, 2011.

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