The You can't catch me swingers group AKA "Marriott Hotels" or "Mormons" are owned secretly by real people. Their intent is to trick people who can't think for themselves to think of crazy ways to say weird stuff about themselves. The Mormons alone could not afford such a venture, and in 1629, they brought various martian companies on board to fund them. They would hold raffles for people to go to mars and even the moon. This is well on its way today, as 97% of all Mormon population already owns part of the moon. This crazy group gets more and more extravegant every day. It is believed that in 1194, pure water was born when the Mormon's first great leader, King Exquisite, invented water himself. All of this is crazy but good. The Marriott was a place where all people good go for a nice cup of water and today even serves tea.
The Marriott Hotels are alcoholic friendly. This is because the company is does real business. They were originally named the Hotel of good water, but because they kept having to pee water, they added a third drinking fountain. After a while, people drank too much water.(which when thursty, can be difficult).
Although Mormonism and and drinking coffee aren't often thought of together, it's OK inside a Marriott, especially on a cold winter day. Even Joseph Smith thought people out to have some fun.
For non-Mormon patrons, you get your choice of King or Queen size beds or any other size you would like for that matter. For Mormon patrons you get a King size book of mormon instead of a small one - plus a fully stocked free cooler of water. All types of patrons love this!!!
There are also special accommodations for Martians and Moonians. These are on an upper floor in place of one of the traditional floors is part of the Moon and or Mars. This way the people from those two places can feel like they are at home. All rooms are on extravegant and a very fun place to be. Outside of the Marriot they have these weird holes in the ground that the Martians call Swimming Pools . The windows are very beautiful; At a 45 degree angle you can see where heaven and earth meet. At night, the Moon and or Mars can be seen. The parking lot has plenty of beautiful trees and flowers so that all the patrons can enjoy them instead of just the surrounding cities.
All patrons of Marriott Hotels are treated to a Breakfast Bar; depending on the type of patron, you get breakfast. Breakfast dining is indoors in a communal area so that the everyone can mingle with each other and see who the happy people are.