Meg Griffin
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“Mffmfmfmmffm”
~ Kenny McCormick on Meg
“But Lois! Meg sucks!”
~ Peter Griffin on Meg
“The Griffins have two dogs now?”
~ Everyone on Meg
“Jesus christ, not even I would have sex with that”
~ Bill Clinton on either Meg or Paris Hilton
Meg Griffin is a character from Family Guy. She is considered the 2nd smartest character in the show (behind Brian), the 23th most entertaining (behind (in the following order) Chris, Adam West, Lois, Brian, Quagmire, Peter, Stewie, Herbert the Pervert, Greased Up Deaf Guy, Peter's retarded coworker Opie, Cleveland, Joe, Bonnie, Loretta, Cleveland Jr., that one guy that keeps trying to bone his girlfriend, Brian's gay cousin Jasper, the giant squid, Sneakers O'Toole, the kid with the upside down face, Ollie Williams, and Lawrence Welk), and has the 2rd worst use of pink (behind Timmy Turner).
Contents |
[edit] Biocrappy
Meg was the unfortunate result of Lois's drunken sexcapades during the late 80's. Lois attempted to abort the unnatural spawn, but the bitch was unable die, due to the fact that her hideous features prevented anyone from coming near her to beat her to death with a bedpan. Another theory suggest that she heard the child had finger nails and couldn't go though with it- there is also something about blueberry flavored condoms. Regardless, Lois convinced Peter that the child was his, despite her tail, which was amputated, then sold to and eaten at some shitty Chinese restaurant shortly after birth.
Having had a fairly happy childhood due to the very high amount of dope she was taking at the time, Meg grew into a overweight teenager but creepily still hot. However, at the age of 14 she was raped by the chicken that peter hates in a revenge rape and rapidly declined in appearance thereafter due to the creepy chicken STD's she got from him.
Meg became a sarcastic teenager and joined youtube.com, where she posts all of her angsty emo blogs, which nobody watches because nobody cares. In fact, this biography of her is pointless because nobody cares enough to look her up. However, it WILL continue pointlessly, just like her existence...
[edit] Personality
Meg is a teenager who whines and complains, and she tries to rape every man she sees and has been successful on countless occasions with osama bin laden being one of the poor souls to be raped why else would he hate america so much, thinking that they want her for her god awful body. She has great passion for Brian her family dog, and wishes for him to be her king when she becomes ruler of the universe. Then she earsex with a gay guy after they claim to god that they wont have sex until married. (wait he wasn't gay until he saw her.) She had sex with a guy on SNL when she was hot, back in the pre-historic ages. (what happened) Then she slept with the Mayor of Quohog Adam West, but who hasn't, really? She happens to be part of the emo subculture, and is trying to rule the world with her physic abilities, super human power of growing her nails, and her deathly farts. Unfortunately, it does not seem to be going so well, as her almost terrifying face seems to destroy all in its path.
She also kills people to vent her rages.
[edit] Likability
In the first season or two, Meg was very well loved and respected by her parents. But more recently, she has been treated like crap and has even been thrown in to the trash compactor on the detention level where she devolved in to George Lucas. Peter and Lois dislike her greatly, the show never admitted why this is, though it is now known to be all George Bush’s fault.
[edit] Filmography
[edit] 1960s
- Meg is Crap Vs. Deadwood Sex (1961) - herself
- The Good, The Bad, and the Swansea (1968) - Lady MacHarris (uncredited)
[edit] 1970s
- Tentacles - Lady President
[edit] 1980s
- Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi (1983) - The rancor
- Ghostbusters (1984) - Stay Puff Marshmallow Man
- Howard the Duck (1986) - Denise
[edit] 1990s
- Beavis & Butthead (1993) - Beavis
- Brantford (1995) - Paula Doutchbog
- Dirty Habits (1996) - You
- Hercules (1997) - Megara (LOLWUT?)
[edit] 2000s
- Family Gay (2000-) - herself
- High School Musical (2005.5) - Gabriela, that girl that was forced to date that gay dude
- The Fox and the Hound (2006) - Vixie
- The Citizen Kane of Horrible Films (2008.242) - Kenny McCormick
- W (2009) - Condoleezza Rice
- Shark Movie (2009) - Sexy S. Shark
- Kinky (2009) - Trio
[edit] Trivia
- Meg has never known her birthday due to Peter not wanting to buy her any presents as all she wants is extensive plastic surgery And because of this, she has never been able to celebrate it.
- She wears a hat (even sometimes under another hat) because her penis sticks out on the top of her head.
- Meg sucks. A lot.
[edit] See also
