Megafelis

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M8A2 Megafelis
Catterror3.jpg
Scientific classification
Kingdom Uncyclopedia
Phylum Meow
Class Trigonometry
Order Kill this guy now!
Family Plantagenet
Genus Megafelis
Species Fatalis
Binomial name
Megafelis fatalis
Specifications
Primary armament lime green 120mm smoothbore gun
Secondary armament Big Teeth™
Power supply 6 × Westinghouse A4W nuclear reactors
Health 1200
Mana 360 MP
Strength
Intelligence Intel Inside (Pentium 4 3.6 GHz)
Weight 72.8 metric tons
Length 40 meters
Special attack MEOW!!!!!!!
Conservation status
AAAAAAAAA!

“Huffing this kitty is a motherfucker”

~ Oscar Wilde on Megafelis

The M8A2 Megafelis fatalis is the delight and terror of the Universe. It is the current Main Battle Tank (MBT) of the United Spades of Amerika, the Roman Empire, and Liechtenstein.

Origins[edit]

The origins of the M8A2 Megafelis fatalis are unknown. There are numerous theories, but none of them have gained widespread acceptance. The controversy has resulted in much death and meowing.

Denial[edit]

45.8% of Uglo-Americans deny the existence of the M8A2 Megafelis fatalis, down from 76.2% in 2001. This may be a result of the fact that unbelievers are delicious delicacies to the Megafelis.

Big Bang[edit]

10.2 % of Romans believe that the Megafelis was created by a REALLY big EXPLOSION!!!!!!! BOOM! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!.

Grand Unified Marine Anthropological Telekinesis-Electrophoresis-Oxidization-Ontology Theory[edit]

120.5% of kitten huffers were undecided because they were eaten by the Megafelis.

People-huffing[edit]

Numerous Megafelii have been known to huff humans. Many countries now recognize this as an effective method of population control, both for humans and the Megafelis, since humans make nutritious snacks, as Oscar Wilde sagaciously proclaimed.

Etymology[edit]

The source of the name has incited much academic debate. However, there is now a consensus among modern scholars.

  • Meg is a corruption of the name of the first known specimen, Kzamkzmthfgfg.
  • The letter ۩ indicates absolute terror in the language of the Proto-Martians. Since there is no letter ۩ in English, it has been converted to a.
  • The fe refers to the the chemical symbol for Ferret. The ancient Chinese believed that the creature was actually a ferret on steroids. Modern DNA testing has proven them to be % correct.
  • The lis means "That which cannot be divided further." in Ancient Greek. Apparently, Aristotle believed that the Megafelis was the basic building block of all matter in the Universe.

The Species Name[edit]

  • Fat- is derived from the Old English root fat, meaning "overweight," since the average Megafelis has a mass of 72.8 metric tons.
  • The word alis means "lime green" in Latin. The male Megafelis has a lime green M1A2 turret.