Mike Brady

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
He's the Man of Your Dreams, big fella!

Mike Brady (1940-198?) was a California-based architect and widowed father of three boys of his own. Then, one day, he met a lady with three girls, who all had hair of gold. Realizing that it was much more than a hunch, and that somehow they must unite in a contractual relationship, he quickly hired a wise-cracking live-in maid and, in September 1967, formed a Bunch.

Over the next several years, Brady helped redefine the traditional family structure as commonly conceived of throughout the United States. Instead of the old-fashioned post-war familial construct of a husband, wife, children, pets, and spray-on deodorant, Brady's bold new vision of the American family focused on brightly-colored bell-bottom pants, perfectly-choreographed talent-show musical numbers, elaborately hare-brained money-making schemes, and insanely petty rivalries between members of the local High School Cheerleading Squad. The Brady Vision for America quickly swept the country, and largely continues to this day, as evidenced by the 2004 re-election of George W. Bush.

Brady's contribution to the field of architecture also should not be underestimated. Brady was largely responsible for the development of the Corporate Cookie-Cutter School of contemporary architecture, which helped free large retailers and video-rental chains from the crushing constraints of community responsibility and heralded the New Age of Visual Homogeneity throughout America. Never again would Americans have to guess the purpose of any commercial structure they encountered, regardless of what city or region of the country they were in. Soon, all American cities and towns began to look exactly alike, thus ending the cruel tyranny of confusing, "uniquely-designed" public-use buildings.

While loved by nearly all who knew him, Brady was hated by rival architect Le Corbusier, who felt Brady was a fascist thug of little talent. Brady, on the other hand, felt that Le Corbusier was a "whiny little Frenchie" looking for a "pissing match," and simply refused to go there.

See Also[edit]