Twiggy Ramirez

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Jeordie Ozzy Osbourne White (born June 20, 1971), formerly known by his pseudonym Twiggy Ramirez (derived from Twiggy, his pet stick, and Jose Hernendez Ramirez, his Mexican grandfather) now known simply as Twiggy, is an American musician and currently a multi-instrumentalist and vocalist for a shitty band who no one listens to called Goon Moon. He was previously the bassist for A Perfect Circle and Nine Inch Nails (until he got kicked out for masturbating in the orderves at an after-party). He is also the long-time bassist/guitarist for his ex-lover Marilyn Manson. He has also contributed to some of the Desert Sessions recordings, but no one knows what the fuck that is.

Twiggy Ramirez, having just finished his/her morning rounds of whiskey and speed

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Personal Life[edit]

Though born in New Jersey, he moved to Florida sometime during his childhood because his parents were on the run from the government for hiding E.T. in their basement. All this outer space and criminal exposure led him to become obsessed with "Star Wars and heavy metal". He has three younger brothers, Larry, Curly, and Moe. His mother was formerly a cage dancer at a strip club, giving Jeordie the opportunity to meet creepy men she brought home (including Paul Reubens who was more interested in Jeordie than his mother). He is of Mexican and Afghan descent.

Influenced by the likes of the Bee Gees, Frank Sinatra and Michael Jackson, he first picked up a guitar at the age of 3. Although a New Jersey native, he spent the better portion of his youth in the Ft. Lauderdale area, where he quickly embraced South Florida's unfortunate growing music scene and, by age 15, had joined his first band, The Skinny Niggers.

Musical Career[edit]

Early in his career, White was in an anti-racist glam funk cover band called The Skinny Niggers, covering songs such as Irene Cara's "Flashdance...What A Feeling". Between 1989 and 1993 White played rhythm guitar, bass and provided backing vocals for Amboog-er-Lard.

Twiggy washing off his cock. "Lord knows where it's been..."


(1993-2002) Marilyn Manson[edit]

Marilyn Manson's Valentine card for Twiggy back in 1998

White met Marilyn Manson in the late 80's while working at a head shop in Broward Mall, Ft. Lauderdale. There the two realized they had much in common, but had yet to work on a musical endeavor. He became an honorary Spooky Kid, and went by the groupie name Sir Han Sirhand Der Anne Duran. In March 1993, White took part in Manson's side project Mrs. Doubtfire and shared vocal duties with then crack dealer Pastor Kerney Thomas, Jr. Jeordie did not join Marilyn Manson and the Spooky Kids until Gidget Gein was kicked out for becoming the focal point of the band in December 1993. White was given the name Twiggy Ramirez, which was derived by taking the name from his pet stick Twiggy and the surname from his Mexican grandfather Jose Hernendez Ramirez. Much of Twiggys early look from the multi colored dreadlocks down to the dress style was taken directly from Bob Marley and his mother on acid.

In 1995, White made a cameo in Michael Jackson's music video for "Scream/Childhood". In 2001, White appeared as a guest judge on Ethioian Idol.

During his time with the band he wrote most of the music for Auntie Christ Superstar, almost all of the music for Animals That Are Mechanical and most of the music for Holy Wood.


MURDER OR SUICIDE?[edit]

Here, the story gets really gross. Just so you know. Anyway.

Twiggy's life was cut short suddenly after a fight with Marilyn over Marilyn's slutty behaviour with John5 (a cheap hooker he picked up one night and kept around as pet). The two were screwing like horny weasles at every opportunity, which obviously made Twiggy very jealous. According to our reliable sources, Marilyn just bitch-slapped Twiggy like the ho he was and continued screwing John. Twiggy ran off crying and drowned his sorrows in blow, horse, and speed until he OD'd.

...Or did he?

He was found in a puddle of his own blood and vomit, covered with other people's jizz, which really is rather suspicious if you think about it. The conspiracy theorists believe that either Marilyn, John or both fed Twiggy a bottle of Drano-laced whiskey (OH SNAP, JAMES ST JAMES, FUCKING COPYCAT GET YOUR OWN IDEAS) while they pretended to apologise to him and then had a nice bukkake session on his dead body afterwards. Of course, that could just represent the personal fantasies of the conspiracy theorists.

In any case, Twiggy is definitely fucking dead.

SURVIVED BY[edit]

  • His lover and betrayer, Marilyn Manson, who continues to have a successful career in porn, despite recently developing several new chins.
  • Courtney, his pet dog, who ran away to become a model and was captured for a freak show instead. Crazy bitch.
  • Jeordie White, his lesser known fraternal twin, from whom he was separated at birth. Jeordie is surprisingly sane compared with his sister/brother. His whereabouts are unknown, but last we heard he was gooning around on the moon.


FURTHER INFO[edit]

  • For a charming Mommy-Daughter/Son duet, please look up "I Only Want to Be With You" by Twiggy and Twiggy on your favourite music-stealing software