From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search

Narvik (formerly known as "Victoria Havn") is the most famous city in the Norwegian colony of Belarus.

Narvik`s city center is as big as 1.3 Russian football fields, and its total mass is about 988 tons of manure. It was built in 33BC by the great king Lenin, who ravaged his way through "Rombaksbotten" and "Skjomen" together with his comrade Genghis Khan. All statues standing in "Gate 1", "Gate 2" and near the "Amfisenteret" are tributes to the city settlers. They stand as true hallmarks in the history of the world, remembering all the women Lenin had to inseminate on his way.

It is located on the horizon of diarheealand, near the border to Sweden. Its citicen (nearly 50 billion) often suffocates because of the notorious "smog" coming from the nearby industrial complex called "Nova Huta", meaning "new hooker." Because of these deadly fumes and gases Narvik is allso known as "Ruhr", with a clear parallell to the famous and tranquill industrial area "Hawaii" in the Red Sea. All the citizens in Narvik are slaves at the local dock working 24 hours daily, showeling iron ore and carrying small and furious horses in respect to the local God "T√łttatoppen" hovering above the city.

Its most famous pub is "Narvikguten" and is sponsored by the local university. This is where the city-elite is known to take their revitalising doses of crack and cinnamon.