New Federalism
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“The entire New York Times staff should be ground up and sold as bulk filler.”
New Federalism was the political philosophy of the Second Galactic Empire, whose rise and fall is chronicled in the Ken Burns documentary series Star Wars (1680). New Federalism builds upon the principles of a strong central government controlling a group of lesser municpalities, adding the social policies and police control espoused by the dark side of the Force.
The New Federalism party came to power due to the political machinations of one Senator Palpatine, who engineered a trade dispute to gain extraordinary executive powers in the Galactic Parliament. The plan culminated with Boba Fawkes detonating a large quantity of gunpowder beneath the Parliament building, simultaneously killing all of Palpatine's senatorial rivals and removing the greatest symbol of the Republic.
Palpatine quickly made good on the ensuing chaos, using his Force magic to turn everybody into clone troopers. These clone troopers were then sent to hunt down all "Force-sensitive" individuals. Force sensitivity, or "feelings", had given these people +2 to their saving throw versus cloning magic, and Palpatine feared that eventually they would escape detection by every single citizen of the Empire, somehow band together even though the Empire controlled all interplanetary shipping, and launch an devastating assault upon the other 99.99999999999999% of the population. Palpatine was one paranoid sonuvabitch. Ken Burns theorized that this was due to the Empirical practice of ingesting lead before every meal, and Ken Burns can get away with that because Emperor Palpatine is dead and can't shoot him with his awesome lightning powers.
The Second Galactic Empire and New Federalism disappeared at approximately the same time, when Palpatine tripped on the stairs in his throne room and fell into a poorly-designed open pit fusion reactor. This also was a piece of crap. The fact that Palpatine sound like a tropical fruit might be due to the fact that he looks like a shriveled prune.
