Nirvana
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“Nirvana is the highest happiness.”
~ Gautama Buddha on Nirvana
“That kid had a heart, until it all drained out.”
~ Bob Dylan on Kurt Cobain
Nirvana is a hugely successful Pixies tribute band (of the genre of polka), lead by singer/songwriter Kurt Cobain, who famously attempted suicide in the early 1990s by marrying Courtney Love. Following the failed suicide attempt, the group bounced back with a string of successful singles in addition to providing the theme song for the hit NBC sitcom 2 And A Half Men. Nirvana is also a worldwide restaurant chain known for serving "heroinies" (secret ingredient is "love").
The group continues to tour, record and produce commercial jingles. Most recently, they appeared on Saturday Night Live mocking their previously anti-mainstream demeanor, having since changed their name to Snow Patrol.
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[edit] Early Years
Nirvana performed under various monickers before settling on Marcy Playground, and later Nirvana. Past names include The Melvins, Mudhoney, Pearl Jam, Sonic Youth, Soundgarden, The Beatles, Dinosaur Jr, R.E.M. and briefly "Cheap Trick being molested by Black Flag and Black Sabbath while The Jam watches and fingers members of The Velvet Underground while he watches Jefferson Airplane have an oral sex orgy with the Grateful Dead".
While critics dismissed the band's early efforts as "kind of boring. Turn it off.", opinion shifted when the band hired an actual producer, Butchy Wig, of Garbaged infamy. While the sound remained boring, it was now louder and on the radio more, prompting critics to declare Kurt Cobain the James Earl Jones of his Generation. They maintain the Grunge tradition of using guitars with only half the normal number of strings. The band moved from cult(no one likes it) status to Corporate Sellout(your Mum likes it) status with the release of 'Smells like Bean Sprouts', a tribute to Seattle's Great Wall restaurant, and the accompanying album '(You Are Always) Onmymind', an Elvis tribute collection. The controversial cover provoked criticism from the US National Swimming Association's Dave Wetass - 'Call that breast stroke? - I don't. The kid has no technique at all. They should have asked Mark Spitz. And he would have brought his own trunks.' In 1995, lead drummer Stanley Kubrick left to pursue a career writing Frank Black songs. Sometimes he would occasionally write a Kim Deal song.
[edit] Band members
- Kurt Cobain - screaming, moaning, screeching, feedbacking, power chords, left-handedness, shotgun
- Dave Grohl - tambourine, glockenspiel, teeth, Unidentified Flying Cylinders, got to sing on one song!
- Krist Novoselic - Son of God, Islamic prophet, ukelele, mute bass, imaginary friend, Libertarian, balding, accordion
[edit] Former or part-time members
- Pat Smear - secondary guitarist
- Charlie Chaplin - original drummer
- Jason Everman - holds the record for the shortest time of anyone being included in a band (he was the second guitarist for a total of 5 minutes)
- Dale Crover - temporarily drummed (twice)
- A couple other guys - played drums before Chaplin
- Greg Brady - marimba
- Frank Black - songwriter (all songs)
- Kim Deal Gordon - upright double acoustic bassoon
- Axl Rose - #1 fan
- That Guy - jumps around all over the stage like a retard. [1]
[edit] Discography
- 1970 - Led Zeppelin IV
- 1970 - Let It Be
- 1988 - Some Dutch Rock Song That You Won't be Able to Get Out of Your Head (Single)
- 1989 - Sterilize Your Needles With Clorox Brand Bleach!
- 1990 - Nirvana Comes Alive
- 1991 - If You're Offended By the Baby's Penis, You Must Be a Closet Pedophile
- 1992 - Incest Kills Bugs
- 1993 - In Udaho
- 1994 - Who the Hell Unplugged All Our Amps?
- 1996 - From the Bleached Banks of Mishkahpah
- 2001 - The Beatles 1
- 2004 - Without The Lights Off
- A few months later - Shiver: The Worst of The Box
- 2009 - A Tribute To Kurt Cobain: Fifteen Years of Deadness
