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- 10000 BC - The wheel is invented by some caveman
- 631 - Nobody expected the Spanish Inquisition, good for him.
- 1938 - Kristallnacht- The night of broken crystal.
- 1939 - Element 377, Kittenhufnium, is first isolated by scientists. They were trying to synthesize THC.
- 1949 - China invades Tibet, granting the Tibetens unlimited religious freedom, as Buddhists around the world rejoice.
- 1951 - The day the Earth stood still.
- 1970] - Charles de Gaulle, President of France, passes away. His death is mourned by a solemn moment of waving white flags. Rioting ensues.
- 1989 - Down goes the Berlin Wall
- 1994 - Suicide bombers pilot the Disneyland Skyway into the Matterhorn.
- 2001 - The November 9th attacks destroy the World Trade Center in New York City and part of The Pentagon in Washington, D.C., and down a passenger airliner in Pennsylvania. In total, almost 3,000 are killed. But only in the UK and countries that use sensible date conventions.
- 2006 - The Republican Party angry at the world for having the crazy liberals beat them like they stole something from them huddle together in a corner and cry like babies! (Little Pussies)
- 2008 - Osama Bin Laden purchases Sunoco gas stations and renames them SunOSama. David Berkowitz unamused.
- 2009 - Jesus is resurrected as you.