Numerology

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For those without comedic tastes, the "questionable parody" of this website called Wikipedia have an article about The Science of Numerology.

“Nothing in biology makes sense except in the light of numerology”

“If you think you understand numerology, you don't understand numerology.”

The number 42 is the Answer to Questions of Life. But doesn't it matter what the Question is?

Numerology is the science by which anyone completing a 2-day course gains the power to predict events from the past. Numerology traces its origins to the ancient mathmeticians of Greece and Egypt, with its basic principles forming the basis of physics.

Ancient history[edit]

Numerology was first practiced by the pharoahs of egypts. Papyrus records show that Pharoah O'Reilly used numerology in the design and construction of his pyramid. Sceptical engineers blame its subsequent collapse on inadequate weight distribution, but numerologists have refuted this, instead blaming scepticism and negative auras.

Slightly less ancient history[edit]

Edgar Cayce, the master of the unseen veil, is credited with the reintroduction of numerology to the world:

"As related to individuals these each vibrate to certain numbers according to their name, their birth date ... then when these appear, they become either as strengths or as losses or as helps or as change ... but ... they are rather as the signs, or the omens; and may be given as warnings ... in any manner that they may be constructive in the experience of the individual."

Cayce's work led to numerology being applied to the science of fortune telling, primarily based on the name of the person for whom a reading is being given. Critics of the time dismissed numerological divination as being unreliable guess-work, but Cayce's research proved that failed predictions were in themselves proof of the valididity of numerology.

His results showed that the failures were the result of sceptical auras inverting the results of the readings. By reversing the readings, thus correcting them, the correct predictions would be found.

Method[edit]

Einstein is smarter than you, and he believed in numerology!

Modern numerology uses the technique of digit-summing to predict the past. Letters are converted in to numbers, based on their location in the alphabet, and calculations performed on the resulting numbers until a significant result is obtained. For example, the name Uri Geller is broken down as follows:

Uri = 21 + 18 + 9 = 48
Geller = 7 + 5 + 12 + 12 + 5 + 18 = 59

The number 59 is not significant, but 48 yields a positive result, according to this quote:

"4 and 8 are not good in their own. but total of 48 gives number 3 which is very lucky. its a gr8 no. to be in any segment."

- nitinsaxena77, Internet forum numerologist[1]

Although specific predictions would normally require that the numerologist use the name of the subject whose past is to be divined, one school of thought believes that all past events can be predicted by digit-summing the name Adolf Hitler.

Predictions[edit]

World War II[edit]

Adolf Hitler. The Nostradamus of names?

Carol Vorderman, famed mathematician and numerologist, accurately predicted the 10th anniversary of the outbreak of World War II. In 1987, Vorderman applied digit-summing to various letters from the name Adolf Hitler:

A = 1
D = 4 
H = 8

4 and 8 = 48
48 + 1 = 49

Historians confirm that World War II did indeed begin in 1939.


Assassination of President Kennedy[edit]

Uri Geller continued Vorderman's work in the field of Hitler-numerology. He found the following:

A = 1
D = 4
O = 15
L = 12
F = 6
H = 10
1 + 4 + 15 + 12 + 6 + 10 = 46

President John F. Kennedy was 46 years-old when he was assassinated. Geller's work confirms that Hitler's name predicted the tragic events of Dallas.

Unlucky numbers[edit]

Some numbers are considered to be intrinsically unlucky. In western numerology, the number 13 is considered unluckiest of all. American buildings often avoid having a 13th floor, through the use of anti-gravity bricks. The gap that would have been the 13th floor is left as a void in space. British numerologist architects have avoided this problem by number the ground floor as being the first floor, and then never building beyond the 12th floor. This is why buildings in the UK are small.

Chinese numerologists consider these fears to be baseless superstition. Lee Wang of the Beijing Institute of Physics and Numerology said "The number thirteen is just another number, and I am saddened by the baseless superstition of my colleagues in the west. It is obvious that the number four is the true harbinger of doom and misfortune."

Regulation of numerology[edit]

The Center for Faith-Based & Community Initiatives regulates numerology and provides guidance to people seeking numerologists. They advise the use of Internet forums, as these are the most reliable source of all information. Google provide an accurate register of numerologists, accessible by searching for Numerology Register.


Examples of numerology in Fiction[edit]


Notes[edit]


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