October 29: National Ignorance Awareness Day /International Rescue Day (Thunderbirds are Go!) / Ramadan ends
- 1497 - Did something happen on this day?
- 1576 - Rolf Harris invents the wobble board and didgeridoo. Chaos ensues
- 1675 - Leibniz makes the first use of the long s, ∫, for integral. 315 years later I have to take calculus. Thanks, man. Thanks a fucking lot.
- 1782 - God gets up, has a slice of toast, then decides it's all too much bother and goes to bed again for 500 years.
- 1929 - The New York Stock Exchange crashes in what will be called the Crash of '29 or Black Tuesday, beginning the Great Depression. I think that was like, when, everyone got really unhappy for a long time.
- 1969 - The first-ever computer-to-computer link is established on ARPANET, the precursor to the Internet. It is used to send porn.
- 1955 - Mother Brown gets me Dog And Bone.
- 1957 - Comma, used innappropriately, millions giggle.
- 1972 - President Richard Nixon declares that he is addicted to the word "Declares".
- 1985 - Howard The Duck, dude. Howard The Duck.
- 1990 - Rolf Harris brainwashes an audience in Melbourne with his filthy basslines on his didgeridoo. Further chaos ensues
- 1998 - Space Shuttle Discovery blasts-off with 77-year old John Glenn on board, making him the oldest person to go into space. He bores astronauts by telling them about how in his day, they didn't have astronaut ice cream, and there were no zero-G toilets, they just had to hold it in the entire mission.
- 2002 - Ozone linked to Al-Quada, President Bush vows to increase carbon dioxide outputs as USA leads the way in the War on Terra.
- 2007 - Rolf Harris returns and formally founds dubstep. Even more Chaos ensues
- 2009 - Pam Anderson's breasts become self aware.
- 2113 - Reality TV goes too far as God, Allah & Budda duke it out in a Pay-Per-View event billed as "The Gods Must Be Crazy". World ends soon after.