Oompa-Loompa genocide

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Angry Birds rounding up and killing innocent Oompa-Loompas (1971 colorized)

The Oompa-Loompa genocide was the systematic mass killing of the Oompa-Loompa people by the Angry Birds in the 1970s.






Build up[edit]

File:Angdolf Birdler.png
Angdolf Birdler

The Angry Birds and Oompa-Loompas had racial tensions for years. The Angry Birds always having an extreme hatred for people with orange skin. Angry Bird Land Chancellor Angdolf Birdler constantly talked of killing orange people. Other Countries were afraid that the Country of Angry Bird Land would make a move and round up the Oompa-Loompas into concentration camps so they would constantly appease the Angry Birds with financial aid to temporarily quell tensions in a peaceful way. Of course the stupid ass hippie ways of the globalist shills at the United Nations would not work out in the end and eventually the Angry Birds did not want financial aid anymore. That, and tax payers in other nations did not like the financial burden of forking over cash to the government just for it to be handed to another country. Therefore the Angry birds started their systematic persecution of the Oompa-Loompas. Why do the Angry Birds hate the Oompa-Loompas you ask? Because they make better fucking chocolate. That's why. I know its a pretty mediocre reason, but whatever. Its still a bad event I guess. It started out with the Oompa-Loompa citizens of Angry Bird Land getting heavy taxes while Angry Birds got no taxes. Some Oompa-Loompas realized quickly what was going on and fled Angry Bird land to immigrate to another country while others stayed out of ignorance and didn't think anything would happen (dumbasses), then the ABL Government started treating the Oompa-Loompas like second class citizens. They took away their memes and weed and made them live in old people homes. OH GOD THOSE OLD PEOPLE HOMES! THEY ARE HORRID PLACES! Later all the Oompa-Loompas would be rounded up and either be shot and tossed in a mass grave or sent to concentration camps.

Political outrage[edit]

Other nations saw what was going on in Angry Bird land and were outraged by what was happening.

"This is a reenactment of the Holocaust!"

-President Nixon on the Oompa-Loompa killings

Eventually the US government would declare war on ABL.

France and Britain would place multiple sanctions on ABL.

The American-Angry Bird War[edit]

The American-Angry Bird War broke out on April 7th 1974 when the US declared war on Angry Bird Land for the mass killing of innocent little orange people. Full US invasion began on April 11th. The first battle was the Battle of Angbirdia. The Battle resulted in a swift victory and the US liberated tons of death camps around ABL. Eventually Angry Bird Land lost the war and Birdler was hung for crimes against Oompamanity.

Impact[edit]

Many were shocked at the site of the mass killings committed by the Angry Birds and feared that they would happen again so the Oompa-Loompa Protection Act was passed to protect the Oompa-Loompas from further harm in the United States, and similar laws were passed in other countries. The Oompa-Loompa genocide will forever live in infamy.