Organic food

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“Come try my organic spizzle.”

~ Peter North on Organic Spizzle

“I'm organic, bitch!”

~ Rick James on Rick James

For organic food to be considered "organic" it has to pass stringent testing and meet industry standards. Contrary to popular belief, organic food is the brainchild of the richest, snobbiest most polluting bastards on the planet, not the tree hugging hippies who adopt hundreds of kittens a day and get sued by the neighbors for violating their homeowners association contract.

In an attempt to raise their social pompous attitude to higher levels they have created a new type of food called "organic" food. Mainly grown with the shredded human organs of Hispanics, "organic" food is super cheap because it's farmed in third worlds country which are usually the farthest possible place from where the food is consumed. It's transported via terrorist nuclear fusion submarines from the colder war era, the food is always served off. A mixture of DDT, Uranium and Oil is used to bring the organic properties out.

The Organic American Public well known for keeping themselves in the dark while being feed McShit.


Meat Farming Methods[edit]

Chicken[edit]

The chickens are given a full education and are treated with the greatest of respect. They are then on mass gassed in Carbon dioxide shower blocks never knowing what was going to happen to them. Although most people believe the last part is pure dirty chicken propaganda and that the chickens are really just going on a holiday where they will be much safer. The Organic Farms federation maintain they treat the chickens as if they where humans.

Dog[edit]

Dead dog is imported live from Korea.

Cow[edit]

You have two cows, they go to Ethiopian Bovine university, they get ducks in their class. You feed them the ducks and then beat them to death with a rolled up newspaper.

Ethiopian[edit]

When ever an employee dies in a fire caused by a lightning strike he is ceremonially chopped up and packaged for consumption

Unicornian[edit]

If you spot a unicorn and then proceed to bow professionally, the unicorn will fall over and become a turnip ready for your organic Consumption.

Fruit Farming Methods[edit]

see homosexuals article

Veg-tables Building methods[edit]

Made of pure uranium they make the perfect object supporting option and the tables are complementary to most decor.