Pacman
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OSHI- Someone wrote two articles about the same thing. After finishing this article, the dude went ahead and wrote Pac-Man. Fuckin' idiot.
“Video games didn't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in dark rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.”
~ Marcus Brigstocke on Pacman
“Revive me!!!”
~ Marcus Phoenix on Pacman
“Wakka Wakka.”
~ Fozzie Bear on Pacman
“I'll chase after his cherry anyday!”
~ Oscar Wilde on Pacman
“AHH PACMAN ATE MY FACE! WHERES MY ELEPHANT?!”
~ Tony Jaa on Pacman
Pakistan "Pacman" Afghanistan Turkmenistan Uzbekistan Tajikistan Kirgistan Kazakhstan Linchi was the founder of the Stan countries. The word stirs up deep emotion in the hearts of many Americans, perhaps deeper emotion than any other word. One can not simply read what 'Pacman' means. One must 'feel' what Pacman means.
Contents |
[edit] Common misconceptions
There are several common misconceptions held in young people today about Pacman. The following are just a few of the more common mistakes:
- Pacman is an American hero. This is simply a grammatical error. The truest way to state this about Pacman is that he is THE American hero.
- Pacman is a yellow circle. This is totally incorrect. Pacman is a yellow sphere with eyes and a mouth.
- Pacman is a true black gangsta, and he is my homie G dog!!! Foshizzle! Actually, this myth has been proven true by the National Gangsta Association (NGA) and is one of Pacman's most celebrated qualities amongst other gangstas.
- PacMan is a computergame. Not true; it's a game that little children play. They have to throw a lot of cheese on the floor. Then they will go eat the cheese and ghosts will come to take them to hell. After they have eaten all the cheese they will go to the next house where new ghosts and cheese are waiting for them. When you have finished all houses in the land Satan will come and you have to defeat him in a Pokemon battle. You will obtain unlimited master balls , kunai knives, ammo and your movesets will change and your only attack will be splash.
- The level 255 of the supposed Pacman computer game is glitched. This is proved false by the developers. In the level, Michael Jackson shows the use of condom. Eventually the developers are forced to censor the level due to the extreme seizure of the deaf children who sees it.
- Many scholars argue that this game was largely responsible for the shift in world thinking in the 1980s concerning the viability of Communism, and thus is more or less directly responsible for the end of the Cold War; those scholars are, however, wrong.
- PacMan is a super ultra n00b
- PacMans real name is Per Kristian Rasmussen
- PacMan has no real name. And neither do you.
- PacMan is an invention of ClayPigeonSite
- PacMan has no idea how to make a name of himself. (Robert Chrysanthemum, maybe.
- Pac-man is a Pokemon that eats everything in sight then will destroy Wikipedia, when in reality, That's Mr. Mouth
- Pac-man was the first game to diplay 1080p. While in fact it was only upscaled 720p. When news of this broke it caused the Anal Riots of 1985.
- Pacman is actually a figmant of the imagination who will wipe out the human race if we are not careful, which by the way we are not.
- Pacman does not really appear in Pacmen's Republic of Hong Kong.
- Pacman is infact Namcap, a Vietnemese spy charged with the assassination of your mom.
- Pacman is really dead. Since his 1998 death in a laddermatch with Tubby Smith, a costumed retarded impostor has played the role of PacMan. However, since PacMan was retarded to begin with, noone has noticed the difference.
- Pacman is currently living in New Jersey with his wife (Ms. Pacman) and kids (Pacboy and Pacgirl) in a seven-story condo. This is not true, as it is actually an eight-story condo
- Pacman is really a mentally impaired, deformed dog that fell into a vat of blonde hair dye.
[edit] Early life
Born in 1937 in Pacmanistan to 2 Pac, just 2 Pac. Pacman suffered from a rare genetic defect in which he was born spherical. Pacman was very unhappy with his defect, and threatened to kill his parents Pacdad and Pacmom, even his little sister, Pacgirl. At the age of five, Pacman was arrested for the murder of a puppy. He got off 48 hours later, getting off as innocent. As soon as he was home, the threats started again. Horrified, Pacman's parents sold him into slavery. It was through slavery that Pacman met Oscar Wilde, a teacher and friend throughout his life. At the age of 7, Pacman fought in World War 2, where he received numerous awards in ghost eating.
Sometime later on, with the rise of technology, Pac-Man quickly had a game programmed loosely back when it was in WW2. Unfortunately, while the scientists were carefully scanning his complex biology into the computer, they discovered a mysterious curse: he was fated to be set upon by the four ghostly presences of the apocalypse, and he shall be chased by them for eternity through a neverending labrynth with white spheres for which he would have a terrible thirst. He would be killed by the touch of these four ghosts, unless he were to find an ancient treasure, in which case he would be able to eat them. He also would be able to gain delicious fruits for a small reward. He was chased for years, until he dressed up like a girl in an attempt to escape (Ms. Pacman). It didn't work, but he liked the makeup, so he stayed like that until he escaped the labrynth and got a therapist.
[edit] Later life
After his second assassination, Pacman retired from his longtime job as a superhero. After a long spell as a script editor for BBC Radio Four, he graduated to the comedy circuit where he proved fairly successful, releasing a live album, the Wakkawakka World of Pacman which was nominated for a Grummy award (1978). He later died pennyless and alone, forgotten due to the fame of his similarly named son, Pac-Man. It was originally thought he had gone back to school to get a degree in child pornography, but such theories were otherwise proved false once we figured out he's just a stupid yellow circle incapable of thought. Then he found out that he was gay and went to find Micheal Jackson. As Pacman would say: "yo yo yo yo yo yo, what it is motherfuckers" "awwww shit, here comes pacman" "hey pacman, whats up" "Me you bitches! I'm high on crack! Wanna freebase?" "No Pacman drugs are bad!" "Nope can't help you man" "Pussies" *smokes bong* "Whoa! Holy shit!"
[edit] arrested
pacman is arrested of carrer ilegal as used car toyota supra.
What the fuck does that sentence mean?
[edit] Fun Facts
- One flaw of the ghosts on the original "Pac-Man" arcade game was that you can sometimes go through the ghosts. Sounds kind of obvious in movies, but in a game it's actually a glitch.
- Pac Man helped God create the crescent moon.
- A number of imitator arcades were released shortly after the release of "Pac-Man". The most notable one, was a version titled, "Crack-Man". Which insinuated the white dots were crack, and instead of ghosts being featured, cop cars were used instead. This version was a big hit in urban areas where Crack itself was popular.
- Pac-Man's original name was "Puck-Man". Since it resembles a similar cuss word, the creators changed it.
- In the arcade game of "Ms. Pac-man", there was a yellow ghost named Sue. But it was changed into the orange ghost Clyde.
- There are 240 pac dots on a board of a "Pac-Man" game that makes Pacman slower everytime he eats one.
- The original "Pac-Man" game has 255 boards, or levels, in order to "beat" the game. After board 255, half of the screen turned into video "garbage" making the game unplayable. This is caused due to an integer overflow. Plus, the creators of the game never even thought of players making this far!
- The apple was worth 1000 points when Ms. Pac-Man eats one. The Strawberry was worth 200, the pear 2000, and the banana 5000. Ms. Pac-Man must have liked apples better than Pac-Man...they were only worth 700 points in the original game!
- The names of the ghosts were Shadow, Speedy, Bashful, and Pokey. Dumbass, Retard, Numbnuts, and Chuck were the NICKNAMES of the ghosts. Their ORIGINAL NAMES, however were the Hellborn Soul Reapers.
- In July 1999, Florida resident Billy Mitchell achieved the first perfect score in Pac-Man (3,333,360) after playing for six hours straight. He beat all 256 screens eating every dot, fruit, and ghost (all four ghosts were eaten with each power pellet) - using only one Pac-Man!
- Pac-Man was inspired by a pizza with a slice missing. Namco designer Tohru Iwatani went out for the evening with some friends and then dove for dinner. The rest is history.
- Pac-Man and his fellow Pacs travel 20 percent faster through mazes that have been cleared of dots than when they're eating. If you've got a ghost on your tail, head for open ground.
- Pac-man featured on the The Biggest Loser (TV) show. And ate all the contestents, mistakening them for cherrys.
- Pac man was a raging alcoholic before sleeping with Satoru Iwata, therefore getting a job at nintendo, wow what a fag
[edit] Things he's eaten
your mom.
lots of dick apparently
