Paul Thomas Anderson
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Paul Thomas Anderson was an American film director who participated in many careers before making his mark with numerous allegedly artistic ventures. Paul Thomas Anderson was merely his show name, since he thought the initials P.T. suited his ego, as they were comparable to famous showman, P.T. Barnum. Anderson's real name was Jack Partridge. He was born to Earl and Lily Partridge on August 2nd, 1970 in the San Fernando Valley of California, but he liked to be thought of as being birthed by the land itself. He died in a tragic accident or possible conspiracy involving frogs, a shotgun, and falling.
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[edit] Life and Work
At age 12, Paul Thomas Anderson was a successful participant on the popular game show What Do Kids Know?’’ but he was kicked off for urinating during an episode and mouthing off to host Jimmy Gator. His resulting anger led to his most productive year of existence, 1982. He recorded a prophetic album of Doors covers and filmed Punch-Drunk Love, a documentary about his sister's wedding.
Anderson briefly worked in the porn industry, and nearly reached star status. An addiction to cocaine however, proved his downfall, and he later abandoned the career. This was dramatized and exaggerated in his film Boogie Nights.
Anderson went into rehab for his cocaine problem, and decided to change the course of his life by becoming a plumber. Eventually, once he amassed a sufficient amount of money, he created his own plumbing company, which was purchased by Adam Sandler (on a whim) under the alias of Barry Egan, in 1995.
Having collected a large fortune by selling his company, Paul Thomas Anderson took a vacation to Hawaii that would change his life. On a plane ride there he found himself sitting next to none other than Samuel L. Jackson. Anderson explained to Jackson that ever since he was a little boy he had dreamed of filming a remake of Psycho, his favourite Gus Van Sant film, and he thought that Jackson would be perfect for Norman Bates. Sadly, Alfred Hitchcock was already in the process of filming a remake. Jackson however agreed to be filmed by Anderson for one hour making random profane comments. Anderson built his first film, Hard Eight, around these comments and spliced the footage of Jackson into it.
Hard Eight skyrocketed Anderson to fame. His follow-up, Boogie Nights, won nine adult film awards and a Grammy for Mark Wahlberg's rendition of The Touch.
Anderson then proceeded to begin work on his most ambitious work, Magnolia, a biblical epic set in his hometown. Sadly, God was displeased with Tom Cruise's language, philandering, and Scientology on the set of such a spiritual film as Magnolia, and in anger sent a gigantic rain of frogs. This storm knocked Paul Thomas Anderson off the roof of a building where he was filming. He fell two stories, when a bullet burst through a window, instantly killing him. His dead body fell the remaining six stories. Ironically, there was a safety net installed on the bottom of the building, and Anderson would have survived had it not been for the hole in his chest. Robert Altman replaced Anderson, and directed the remainder of Magnolia. Anderson's autopsy revealed that the director was plagued with cancer, and likely would have died during production anyway. The bullet was found to have come from the gun of Oscar Wilde. Wilde had been slated for a cameo in the film, but had been cut. It is believed that Wilde was aware of the rain of frogs and that Anderson would fall from the roof, and accordingly plotted Anderson's murder. Wilde was never charged for the crime. Instead, Delmer Darion, a fireman who had been called to the scene to deal with frog-induced fires, confessed to the murder and promptly committed suicide. It is now believed however that the whole situation was a conspiracy: Oscar Wilde was framed and Darion was a fall guy. The real culprits were three blond brothers by the names of Paul, Thomas, and Anderson. And I'd like to think this was all a matter of chance.
Paul Thomas Anderson's funeral was attended by notable porn stars Amber Waves and Dirk Diggler. Punch-Drunk Love was released posthumously in 2002. A new film, There Will Be Blood is to be released in December of 2007, under Anderson's name. It is believed, however, to truly be a work of Alfred Hitchcock, as a guilt offering to the deceased Anderson for ruining his dream of directing the Psycho remake.
[edit] Relationships
Paul Thomas Anderson dated every woman in the independent music industry. He was briefly engaged to Aimee Mann during the production of Magnolia. He is also rumoured to have had a disastrous relationship with Oscar Wilde, possibly another motive for murder, casting further suspicion on Wilde.
In terms of working relationships, Anderson had difficulty directing actors. Philip Seymour Hoffman directed all of them for him. Hoffman inspired some great performances in Magnolia including Star Jones as Marcie and Oprah Winfrey as Marcie's twin sister. Pat Robertson, eager to be involved in a religious film, was an incredible stunt double for Jason Robards, while Chuck Norris was stunning in scenes cut from the fifteen hour movie in which he was sent in to drop-kick dogs, since Tom Cruise was too wimpy to do so himself.
[edit] Filmography
Hard Eight (1996)
Boogie Nights (1997)
Magnolia (1999)
Punch-Drunk Love (filmed in 1982; released twenty years later)
There Will Be Blood (not yet released)
[edit] Discography
Peace Frogs: A Twelve Year Old Covers the Doors (1982)
The Boogie Nights Soundtrack: Featuring Music by Paul Thomas Anderson, Mark Wahlburg, Korn, Linkin Park, My Chemical Romance, and Enya (1997)
The Magnolia Soundtrack: Featuring Music by Paul Thomas Anderson, Aimee Mann, Jon Brion, Aimee Mann, Kevin Federline, Aimee Mann, 50 Cent, and Aimee Mann (1999)
Duets with Aimee Mann and Fiona Apple (2000; posthumously released)
