Pie v. Sponge
When the world was young, around 0 A.D., the mighty Sponge walked the earth, threating the inhabitants of it, pie. Pie would not care for this kind of tolerance, so Pie donned his magical pants and cream, and loaded it's Holy Machine Gun, the same gun that Moses used with Jesus to defeat the Romans. It was historically accurate because of that.
In what seemed like a reenactment of David & Goliath, the sponge downloaded pr0n from the Internet and used it to hack the Pie Galactic-13 System (PG13+S) The pie loaded the ammo clip on his M2000, aimed, and shot the Sponge's internet, ultimately ruining Oprah Winfrey's hope of galactic domination. (Oprah later used the Hungry Hungry Oprahs game to claim global dominance)
At this point in time, Jesus, Bill Gates, Al Gore, and Leonardo DeCaprio arrived at the scene, looking down upon the gloom that was the broken Modem. "HAXD LOLOLOlOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!11" said Jesus, Al Gore, and Leonardo DeCaprio. However, Bill Gates, heartbroken at the only version of the internet being destroyed, rose up. "I shall smite thee with thine Holy Hand Grenade," cried Bill Gates. And with one swift move, Bill Gates ran towards the pie and the sponge, and threw the grenade at Jesus. (Some people believe this is what actually killed Jesus)
Al Gore, being a democrat, pleaded to the U.N. in hopes of stopping the grenade from exploding. Leonardo DeCaprio sat there and combed his hair while Jesus just stared at it. Before long the Pie and Sponge were staring face to face again, with Bill Gates trying to rebuild the Internet from rocks and a dodgeball.
The pie and sponge glared each other down. "Thou shalt not stand up to thine wrath!" yelled the sponge. "I do not have feet anyway!" screamed the Pie. Miraculously, without feet, the Pie jumped into the air, did a triple backflip (Watched too much Olympics) and hit Sponge square in the face, killing them both. Without their leader, the pie inhabitants of the planet Spaceballs died.
Bill Gates later became an e-crack addict from his redesigned version of the Internet, creating the second version of pr0n, called Hentai, and inventing Football, which used severed heads instead of the old "pigskin."
"I love pie!" ~ Oscar Wilde