Prince Harry

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Harry, remembering his heritige
Harry deployed to Afghanistan.

“I was shocked that Harry used the word "paki" when referring to an asian comrade. I've spoken to him personally and he's now aware that the word to use is "sooty"”

~ Prince Charles on Prince Harry

“I can't believe he is really my brother, with that stupid ginger hair! I think he's the result of our mum being raped by an alien.”

~ Prince William on Prince Harry

Prince Harry Saxon Windsor, aka The Artist Formerly known as Prince Harry and Harry Pothead also known as a nazi coward who saps tax payers money is the son of Prince Charles (well, officially anyway) and Princess Diana of Wales. Prince Harry (Duke of Nitwit, Baron of Bognor) is 3rd in line to the throne of The United Kingdom, something which would never happen in a country with a sensible attitude to choosing its head of state. Harry was awarded the title of 'Harry Pothead' after becoming Europe's most popular dealer of recreational drugs in 2005. Cults worship him as if he were a God, followers attempt to imitate him by dying their hair ginger and acting like guffawing upper-class morons. He has consistently won the renowned title of 'Upper Class Twit Of The Year' as well as 'Britain's Biggest Minger' for the past five years. Prince Harry also visited Lord Jaffa's son Weasly in the story of creation in the religion Gingeranity.

Early Years[edit]

Harry was born in 1984 to the sounds of Bucks Fizz and Wham!. Because children are extremely boring and of no interest unless you're Gary Glitter there's not much more to say about him until 1997 when his mother, Princess Diana, was killed in Paris and everyone remembers him walking behind his mother's coffin alongside his brother, the better-looking and more sensible Prince William. But who cares about him, the boring git?

Later[edit]

Once he reached adulthood, Harry quickly jettisoned the image the Windsor's had tried hard to build-up that they were a sensible family governed by prudish morals and instead decided to emulate his ancestor Edward VII. First, he was caught cheating no his Art Exam. Then, he got himself busted for smoking cannabis and was forced by the Palace to go and look at some heroin addicts (yes, that makes sense...) before promising he'd be good from then on. But instead he decided to dress up as a nazi a few years later in tribute to Edward VIII (let's be honest, they should have called him 'Edward', he's an Eddy through-and-through). Again, he was forced by the Palace to say he was sorry and that dressing up as a nazi was something you'd expect a spoiled upper-class twit who wants for nothing to do, not a member of the British Royal Family. But you can't keep a good Harry down and when he was made to join the army (the only thing his myopic family think counts as "serving the country") and despite the best efforts of the Queen to control him he managed to call his colleague a 'paki' on the privacy of videotape. Despite Harry's protests that it was a "friendly" term used "as part of the cameradery of the barracks" he was made to apologise. His grandfather, Prince Philip was said to be "appalled" that Prince Harry had referred to an asian colleage as a 'friend'.

What next?[edit]

He'll probably fuck Paris Hilton in public or something, who knows? Go Harry, you wacky racist toff you!

Alternatively, he may build himself a spaceship and fly to another planet to create a new race.

Preceded by:
HRH Prince William
Line of Succession to the British Throne
Succeeded by:
HRH The Duke of York (Prince Andrew)
Preceded by:
Nick Griffin
World's Biggest Racist
2009
Succeeded by:
'incumbent'