Professor Chaos
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Professor "Marjorine" Chaos(11 September 2002-) is an active terrorist leader of the radical redneck terrorist group Al-Chaos, based somewhere in Colorado. His power is said to be over 9000, which was, coincidentally, claimed by a local 4th grader named Butters Stotch.
[edit] Rise to Power
Professor Chaos' early past is currently unknown and uninteresting. He was first noticed as a public threat when he co-developed the concept of a cluster fuck. His influence in the concept is so strong, his mere presence can bring complete cluster fucktity. The true inventor of the cluster fuck theory, George Bush, wanted to test its effects on the world, so he sent Professor Chaos to Iraq. It was there where the professor was fired for not being a very good replacement for a best friend. It was there where Professor Chaos was inspired to become what he is today. After 2-3 months of cluster fucking in Iraq, Professor Chaos returned to his hideout in order to plan his first acts of cluster fucking against some of his most hated enemies: the EPA, Captain Planet, the fatass, and Walt Disney.
[edit] Permanent alliance with General Disarray
Being a former Soviet military leader during the Era of Happy Phun Tyme, General Disarray's military experience matches that of an Easter Bunny Rabbit (which is pretty damn impressive). After watching a nicely planned terrorist video made by Professor Chaos, General Disarray sent him a secret message in the form of an empty Reese's Pieces box that was to be carried by a retarded turkey. Unfortunately, the message was discovered to be a copyrighted essay from a Purdue professor that General Disarray copied and pasted in a Microsoft Word document and rearranged the wording in the same fashion a high school junior would do after he realized the english essay she neglected for the past month is due tomorrow. Nevertheless, Professor Chaos accepted General Disarray's petition for alliance, bringing much chaos and disarray to the world.
- Basically, the world is now fucked.
[edit] Involvement in the War of 1812
Professor Chaos and General Disarray played a mind-bogglingly huge role in the War of Boringashell. It was here where General Disarray went completely Bat Fuck Insane after he lost the Battle of New Orleans. This war was perhaps the shittiest performance ever made by the two terrorist leaders, with embarrassing performances in military strategy and espionage and messaging and cooking and kitten huffing bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bal lab abl alb.....................
It was also here where Professor Chaos first uttered the words: "Oh, hamburgers."
[edit] Lifestyle of a chaotic professor
Not a lot is known about the lifestyle of Professor Chaos; the only information that the CIA was able to rack up was his birthplace, his current residence, his favorite dinner food, his sexual orientation, his ethnicity, his favorite show, his inspiration to become Professor Chaos, his supplier, the kitten that he huffs, the huff that he kittens, the he that huff kittens, the that kitten huffs he, and his social security number.
[edit] His Birthplayce
- Topeka, Nebraska.
[edit] His Current Residence
- Stotch household, South Park, Colorado
[edit] His favorite dinner food
- Spaghetti-o's and/or fresh curtain sellers
[edit] Sexual orientation
This has yet to be confirmed, as Professor Chaos is currently "bi-curious", in which the only solution is the compelling power of Cheeze-its Crust.
[edit] Ethnicity
- Alaskan Native Eskimo
[edit] Favorite Show
Family Guy and Hannah Montana
[edit] Inspiration to become Professor Chaos
His parents would ground him if he didn't.
[edit] His supplier
- The Chinese Government, the Russian Government, and Cisco
[edit] The kitten that he huffs
- Kitty
[edit] The huff that he kittens
[edit] The he that huff kittens
- Professor Chaos
[edit] The that kitten huff hes
- That's spanish for like a fighting chicken.
[edit] His Social Security number
- 776-32-4267
- [When put into a phone, it spells (PROFCHAOS)]
