Prophets are people who claim to be in contact with God and/or have the power to make things cream-filled, who doesn't like things that are cream-filled? Unlike the rest of humanity they apparently have a really sweet broadband connection to the Almighty, and not just a couple of cans and a piece of string.
Since the dawn of time, prophets have walked among us. They invented religion, and as such hold the patents to it. The name prophet stems from a terse conversation that occurred between Ugg, the very first prophet, and a doubter in his prehistoric tribe. Thanks to the time-traveling pilgrims this conversation has been plucked from obscurity, and delivered to modern science.
Prophets use a very sophisticated process. This requires three steps:
Over the eons many people have claimed to be prophets. Some are more credible than others. But all produce that spicy, cheesy goodness that mankind so craves.