Randomness
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
[edit] NEPTUNE SALAD
“Probably”
~ Magic 8-Ball on randomness
“PEOPLE WHO EAT BASIL ARE LAME!”
~ A very drunken Ashley on Rock Of Love Bus on people who eat basil
“Leaves are people too!”
~ A microwave on leaves
[edit] History
Randomness is a relatively crazed invention which was invented in 2001 by Barney the Dinosaur, with some help from Barney the Dinosaur. Although it was originally meant as a substitute for blanket, it was soon adopted by programmers everywhere to help them write l33t programs for their xboxes. It is now widely used in quantum cryptography to help provide a bit of information. Barney the Dinosaur thinks it's a load of crap.
[edit] Achieving true randomness
[edit] Mastering randomitity
In order to achieve true randomizationalism, one must rid thy self of all forms of coherency and logical connections. Consider the following sentence
The international coalition of bi-racial carrots advised women to calculate fixed-rate-mortgages ONLY while valet drivers were siphoning milkshakes from lumberjack equipment.
This sentence is devoid of all logic, making it fish sticks.
The 4th of July accused Kansas of operating a quilt bakery. Astounded, quesadillas nationwide held kittens for thirty minutes.
In this example, you can see that terrible yo-yo's aren't fast when you calculate spleen density.
Hector the vat of grease handcuffed four allergies but not before dissecting wooden cockroaches to check for peacock contamination.
A true master at defeating sequence and meaning will fornicate twenty-seven yard-signs with tofu horticulture!
Basements everywhere combined Worcestershire sauce with indo-china and distributed pamphlets to fleas to alert them a lack of Rolaids on Saturn.
[edit] Worthless Crap + Banana Ghosts
[edit] What to do
If you are, which you is (otherwise you would not be being), you should be going, and being to go: up.
Sorry I have an cold. But listen ear missus. If, philosophically, you were to, ipso facto, not be. The half the bee, has got to be. Visa vi it's entitiy, d'you see? Now we shall get down to bus-in-ess. As you are walking down the street which you are obviously not doing now, unless you have one of those new-fangled things what do this, which unless you have you are in a perfect position to prove the point which I 'ave just been making. Although your entir Waaagh is a turn left which has been blacked out for your own . in the way wumphf LOL
[edit] Random Comment on Randomness
So the slight variations in the exposee goes to show that the unclear forces are irrelevant in the structural manner the core of the alligator is formed. It's like a beginning adlib you see. If you take words disregarding their nature you can subjugate them to any use and they'll sound correct, even if they like soup. Sarah even asked me. So that means a round flying peripheral alongside blue tally whackers make for a nuance that simply doesn't want to be dealt with until next year. Give it a decade or two and you'll have a flabbergasted mammal on your hands. In situations such as these only only a demonicly high powered assault rifle does the trick. These machinations of doom are only things that can properly obliberate the virtuous monstrosity created from the combustible environs from Tangania. If that constitutes destruction then do so but don't come crying to me when you realize the said proposal makes little sense to the hypothetical lies of the century.
[edit] Randomness
Big beef corn soup and potatoes are floating around the general store at five hundred miles per hour on a Sunday morning's afternoon. They need more coffee mugs! So there had better be one hundred Santa sticks and potato butt nuggets in your ear lobe before the time of the biff is up, or there'll be no pans and no hot sauce for you! Everyone needs to know when are the telephones coming back? GUESS WHAT?!? YOU AREN'T THE FUCK!!!!! Get me a brownie, blanket, blanket, and hold the blankets. NOW! So then I wrote this check, and everybody died and it was like DA FUX! Then it was Batman in the hot tub, and he was with a mustard shake, and they were doing garlic sex in 4 dimensions. A rise in the blanket market tends to receive the curative success of its competitors in the blanket trade. This curative litte blanket gives rise to a whole new blanket of blanket in the long run, despite a sharp, curative increase in the rate of curative blanket quite cheekily. Go home and wash your head of stink with your bad self.
Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them says "Peanut."
[edit] Random People
I am a cat person, but I never liked potatoes. Oh God, I think I just farted on Hitler's cat who is from Albania, not to be confused with Turkey. Nobody likes Raymond. Two fat guys ponder about the creation of the university and hot dogs. A giant mushroom was recently discovered in a tropical rain forest.You is an example of random people.
[edit] The Randomness Continues
Remember the most important lesson of Randomness... Side effects may include: Dry mouth, Nausea, Vomiting, Diarrhea, Sleepiness, Water retention, Painful recollage, Hallucination, Dementia, Psychosis, Myxomatosis, Coma, Death and Halitosis. Randomness isn't for everyone; consult your doctor before use! (Also beware of Rinjas! They'll kill you with their Random-Direction-Flying-Ninja-stars! )
[edit] Appealing Random Facts that will make you Mr./Mrs. Popular!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!JELLY BEANS!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!==
- people will turn into red carpets if they love to sing
o rly?
- Gentlemen over the Age of Aquarius are more likely to be over the Age of Consent than Gentlemen who are over the Age of Aquamarine-enhancing pheromones.
SHUTUP!!!! KNOW U SHUTUP MAKE ME OK I WILL BLAHHHHHHHHH I EAT CHOCOLATE FOR DINNA, BREAKFAST AND TOILET TIME!!!!!!!!!!
All the way around his head! AND hit the sign!
So.
[i herd u liek mudkip]
[edit] Potatoes
The potato is a starchy, tuberous crop from the perennial Solanum tuberosum of the Solanaceae family. The word potato may refer to the plant itself as well. In the region of the Andes, there are some other closely related cultivated potato species. Potatoes are the world's fourth largest food crop, following rice, wheat, and maize.
Randome, Raight?
[edit] Significance of Goats
Goats are mystical creatures that eat tofu, and have many precious minerals embedded in their anus, and the ring of their anus is generally covered in a strange flourescent fungus.
[edit] See also
- PIEPIEPIEPIEPIEPIEPIEPIEPIEPIEPIE!
- Yo mamma
- Toilet time
- IWHBYD
- Being Random
- Not being Random, or Random: The Lack Of...
- Michael Jackson wuz here
- I'm certainly not here
- LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
- OOh, click here
- Can you smell this brown? I think it tastes like 42. But kinda feels like a yellow drowning of 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 Hippos
- This will send you somewhere
- FAQ: Question- How many licks does it take to get to the tootsieroll center of a tootsiepop. Answer-Jesus is the answer to everything
- Click here, Jesus loves you!
- I'm not random, I'm 17 and still 42 and Heffalumps
- Help, I've fallen and I can't make my baby spit up
- Obesity is not a crime, it's a misdemeanor
- Clicking here will make you feel special
- Pop quiz: Where does Puff the Magic Dragon Live
- 8675309, is really a commonly mistaken date. It's August 6th, at 7:53, 2009 ('09)
- Supermassive Black Hole
- Wanna hear a racist comment? White people are 13% Racist
- "This really sends you somewhere random", CAPTAIN OBVIOUS
- I farted
- Hire me, I'm random
- I live on the train that arrives at platform 9 and 127/875. This takes you to Hogblarts
- Your parting gift is a major drop in IQ
- Double the Random: Click Here
- NO CLICK HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- This can kill Grue of grues can kill
- ME WANT PIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!