Rhys Gragoranovich Calder
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Rhys Gragoranovich Calder (Russian:Человек Ортомобиль Зеленый) (April 19, 1870-Present), is a Russian/Welsh Nationalist. He is a former Bolshevik Party member and one of the founders of The Global Soviet Hardliner Nationalist Party (G.S.H.N.P.)
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[edit] Early life
Born in town of Barysh in the Ulyanovsk Oblast , Russian Empire, very little is known about Calder's life prior to the 1905 Revolution. All that is completely confirmable about his past is that his father (name unknown) was in the Tsarist army, his mother (who's name is also unknown), was Welsh and that Calder joined the Bolshevik Party in 1901.
Calder was involved in the Revolution attempt of 1905, he led a mixture of workers and soldiers through the streets of Petrograd, destroying vast amounts of bourgeoisie property. Unfortunately many of his comrades were killed by the army as they continued to make their way through the streets, Calder was arrested and thrown into Chetverg Prison, while here he meets Philip Henry, Peter Neal Taylor and Ralph Womack. They establish the G.S.H.N.P.
Calder and the other founders of the G.S.H.N.P. were able to escape from Chetverg in 1908, through the use of the Kremlin on wheels.
[edit] Life: Post Chetverg
[edit] Outbreak of WW1
Following the outbreak of WW1 in 1914, Phil advised Rhys to join the army so that he can spread Bolshevik propaganda among the troops. Rhys did so.
Over the course of the war, Calder witnesses many horrors, most famous of those being the Battle of Tannenberg (1914). During all of the carnage the Russian army faced during the war, Rhys continued to spread Bolshevik propaganda, his hard work finally paid off in 1917. Vast numbers soldiers began to desert and make their way back to Russia to aid in the revolution.
[edit] The Russian Revolution (1917)
Rhys was involved in the Russian Revolution of 1917. [1]
[edit] The rise of Joseph Stalin
In spite of Rhys and the rest of the G.S.H.N.P. initially being on the side of Leon Trotsky during the early days of his fight against Stalin for leadership of Communist Russia, they later turned on him after it was decided that they disliked his Party/rave name "Leon". However, in a strange twist of hysterical Bolshevik history, from this point onwards Rhys took the rather ludicrous party/rave name of 'Duffman'!
[edit] Air Force career
Rhys joined the Soviet Air Force shortly before the outbreak of The Great Patriotic War[2], he flew in many key operations including several Airstrikes on Berlin.
[edit] Service during the USSR-Belka War
Calder flew as part of the 472nd Air Force detachment during the USSR-Belka War from the years 1947-1951, he was one of the first ever MiG-15 pilots. The Belkan's came to fear him as "The Crimson Wings of Death" (Belkan:Svjetski Države Prosinca)
[edit] Service during the Korean War (1951-1953)
Rhys was among the select few Soviet pilots sent to North Korea to strengthen its Air Force, he became a force to be reckoned with in the infamous MiG Alley [3]
[edit] Warning to Nikita Khrushchev about his Virgin Lands Scheme
2 weeks before Khrushchev put his Virgin Lands Scheme into action, Calder approached him and said,
"Listen to me Niki, your plan to try to grow food etc. up in the Urals isn't a good idea, did you stop to consider if it were, either glorious comrade Lenin or, to a lesser extent of greatness, comrade Stalin would have done it already? Trust me Niki, be smart and play the game....if you do this...you'll most likely end up regretting it."
Unfortunately Khrushchev did not heed Calder's words, and by 1964...he did indeed regret the initiation of the Virgin Lands Scheme, as it had failed.
[edit] Life: Post the collapse of the Soviet Union
[edit] Career as an author
Rhys has written several books since the collapse of the Soviet Union, his 2 most famous books to date are, "The glorious triumph of mighty and supreme hero Comrade Lenin over the evil bastards...the bourgeoisie" and his autobiography, "My life was perfect.....until I met that bearded fool." The "bearded fool" referred to in the title is in fact Peter Taylor, a fellow founder of the G.S.H.N.P.
His latest, less well-known book "The 500 nails in the 100 coffins" is on sale now. This details Rhys's angry response to Peter Taylor's misspelling of Ralph (he spelt it with an f), and the description of Rhys on a piece of paper as 'That Welshman'. There were many more nails in many more coffins to follow, which are detailed in this book. This masterpiece can be purchased directly through the Philip Henry Youth bookstores, in the 'Virgin Land schemes' section, for the affordable sum of £1 000 000.
[edit] The occupation of Wales
On June 6th 2007, Calder led the W.C.P (Welsh Communist Party) in a Revolution in Wales, the Capitalist Government were overthrown and he was declared Chancellor of Wales.
[edit] Close friendship with Fidel Castro
Calder is very close friends with Cuban leader Fidel Castro, the friendship between the men is so strong that Philip has appointed Rhys the G.S.H.N.P.'s representative in Cuba.[4]
"Each day that Fidel lives longer puts a smile on my face, because I'm sure it pisses off the Americans."
Rhys talking about his good friend Fidel, who incidentally is planning a table tennis match with Acle Pirates in the year 2434 (yes, the fucking legend will still be alive then!)
[edit] Alleged connection to organized crime
The FBI stated that they believe that Calder has very close ties and even a personal friendship with Don Vincent Brassi , leader of the Brassi Crime Family.
