Roman

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“I'm looking to find a Biggus Dickus
~ Tamia on Romans

Roman is a term used when a cell phone or other wireless communication device connects to a "home" network through another company's service network because the phone in question has left the normal service area. This normally happens only when the cell phone's owner somehow escapes from their cell, usually through the use of a Get Out of Jail Free card or a cake with a file baked inside.

Usually extra charges are incurred, and both cellular companies must have an already-existing business agreement. Or a blood pact.

Roman language[edit]

Due to the extra expenses incurred during Roman calls, many "Romans" have adopted a highly altered version of God's Language, Brazilian Portuguese, which is spoken in much the same way that cursive is written; in a way designed to increase the speed of language transfer (in this case, speech). This is done by adding extra vowels to lots of words and by creating several stupid-looking letters, like "That Funky E Thing" or "The Upside-Down U With The Pointy Bits". Examples of Roman text includes:

Expressio unius est exclusio alterius

(I caught the plane to London and got an espresso... what's up?)

Ubi solitudinem faciunt, pacem appellant

(Did you hear about the United States' war with Iraq?)

Deus ex machina

(I can't get this machine to work. Literal translation is "'PC Load Letter'?! What the fuck does that mean?")

Ars est celare artem

(You're sitting on my celery, you know. Etruscans wouldn't be too happy.)

Carbarandum Fuckum

(We Should Leave Iraq)

Quidquid agunt homines nosti farrago libello est

(What you're reading on this site is libel!)

Roman statesman[edit]

See also[edit]