Schindler's Christmas List

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Oskar Schindler once mailed me his Christmas List, thinking I was Santa Claus. I have since sent it to Stanley Kubrick who has made it into a movie.

This film was originally sent out as "Schindler's List 2: The Revenge of the son of Steven Spielberg's Electric Boogaloo: Schindler's Christmas List"

Schindler's Christmas List[edit]

  • iPod
  • iPod mini
  • iPod micro
  • iPod nano
  • iPod pico
  • Xbox 360 (Those things go up into millions on eBay)
  • Eggs
  • Drugs
  • A Book on how to make a homemade bomb
  • An Atari Jaguar with Wolfenstein 3D
  • Trimuph of the Will on DVD
  • The head of Adolf Hitler
  • A Clockwork Orange on DVD
  • The Steven Seagal Box Set
  • The head of Conan O'Brien
  • Happy fun ball
  • A box of Huggies Thongs and Oops, I Crapped My Pants!
  • A Playstation 3 Surgery Merger (in which a PS3 is surgically merged with your brain)
  • A HORDE OF ANGRY KITTENS
  • A colour television
  • You
  • Auswitz Monopoly (copyright Parker Bros, 1946)

Criticism[edit]

Steven Spielberg has criticised Schindler's Christmas List for not being serious. While his film is a serious drama about Oskar Schindler's Grocery List. Due to the criticisms, the original title, "Schindler's List 2: The Revenge of the son of Steven Spielberg's Electric Boogaloo: Schindler's Christmas List" was changed to simply "Schindler's Christmas List". Soon, the sequel, Schindler's Worst 100 Lists, and the fourth film Worst 100 of Schindler's Worst 100 Lists. Stanley Kubrick was angry about how Spielberg painted the film that he painstakingly worked on as a simple ad-comedy. He pointed out that that was very hypocritical of Spielberg, for Schindler's List is considered one of the funniest comedies, in the vien of Airplane! and The Naked Gun. Spielberg soon responded by saying that he planned to spit on Kubrick's grave and User:71.225.148.52's grave. User:71.225.148.52 went on to smoke crack while Stanley Kubrick made A.I.:Artificial Idiocy and That Porn Film With Tom Cruise. He released That Porn Film With Tom Cruise, but died, so A.I. was buried with Kubrick. True to his word, Spielberg hacked a loogie onto Kubrick's grave. At night, he hired his bitch, Quentin Tarantino to dig up his grave and get A.I. Spielberg soon released A.I. as his own film, but Kubrick got his revenge because the film sucked.

Availability[edit]

Another criticism is that all of these items are not available on the free market, Except for you, which is all Schindler got. It's not "All I want for Christmas is you", it's "All I want for Christmas is you (and a bunch of other random crap)."

To tie in with the re-re-re-re-re-release of the film, All the items became available on Amazon.com.

Epilogue[edit]

Like the rest of Stanley Kubrick's films, this features a hilarious epilogue a la Animal House (Animal House is generally considered to be Kubrick's masterpiece). As with all Kubrick's epilougues, it is set to Asia's Heat of the Moment

Take a look:

  • The iPods proceeded to sell five total units, bankrupting Steve Jobs.
  • Mozart's grave site is now the most popular gas station in Vienna.
  • Stanley Kubrick went on to die.
  • Schindler only got you for Christmas. He has since returned the gift.
  • You proceeded to watch The Steven Seagal Box Set.