Silver

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Silver is a metal, codenamed Ag. This is because it makes people aggressive, though not as aggressive as gold, codenamed Au because it makes people go aughhhh! when they're being tortured to reveal where the chest of buried pirate treasure is. Some scholars claim that it comes from the Latin argentum, but this is doubtful, because it would be abbreviated as "Ar", and only pirates say that.

Sometimes there's silver and diamonds and emeralds and rubies in the treasure, too, depending on what the pirates raided.

Sometimes, if you find a treasure of the gay pirates, all you get is really nice evening gowns in unfeminine sizes.

Also, silver bullets can be used to shoot werewolves. They can be used to shoot people and normal wolves too, and just about anything else, but lead ones are cheaper, so make sure you're shooting at a werewolf (or that someone else is paying for the bullets). It is said that they are equally effective against Battle Pelicans, though these claims are unverified.

The Lone Ranger used to shoot silver bullets, didn't he? You don't hear a lot about werewolves in the Wild West but they were obviously more of a problem than people liked to admit. You hear about ghost towns but not vampires or werewolves.

Women also use Silver Bullets(tm), but not for shooting, wink wink nudge nudge.

OK, so I've been asked to point out that I grossly libelled the gay pirates, they don't dress up in women's clothes and I should instead have referred to the transgendred pirates. Sorry about that.

Silver is best known as being the metal for people who are probably better than you, but just aren't good enough. Nancy Kerrigan wasn't good enough. Bode Miller wasn't good enough. It is a well established fact that no one wearing silver has ever been on a Wheaties box because people hate losers.

Things made of Silver[edit]


CHART OF PRIMARY COLOURSColoursColors

Brown Red Orange Gold Yellow Olive Green Cyan

Blue Indigo Purple Violet Pink Black Gray/Grey Silver White Beige