Slappy's Angels 3
|Producers||Oscar Wilde, Skippy Squirrel|
|Runtime||Ninety (90) minutes|
|Distributed by||Fox Bros. Network|
Slappy's Angels 3 is the 2011 sequel to the 2007 film Slappy's Angels and it's 2009 sequel Slappy's Angels: Full Throttle, making the franchise a trilogy. The film sees Minerva Mink reprising her role from the second film as the newest angel.
Having foiled Pamela Anderson, Paris Hilton and Oliver Cromwell, Slappy, Lola and Minerva have set up a crimefighting agency in Los Angeles, with Skippy as their aide. The service they run is known as:
Despite their previous successes in the past, business quite recently is slow, and they have resorted to posing semi-nude for vacation posters for travel agents. Skippy is beginning to think about shutting down the agency, when they finally get a break.
Their old friend, Andy, a prominent member of the Uncyclomedia Foundation, has been kidnapped by ninja monkeys belonging to Wikipedia. A ransom note has been sent out via PBS, and the kidnappers demaned $9,999,999,999.03 for his release.
Taking the first flight to New York, the Angels begin to ponder the problem. In the first place, Wikipedia is run by an infinite number of monkeys on typewriters, so who could possibly train them? And in the second place, who would be able to convince PBS to give three minutes of airtime from a paying sponsor? The group ponders the matter, until drinks are served. Skippy finds his drugged, and convinces Minerva to help him remove the poison from him in an airplane bathroom.
Thanks to Minerva, the poison is isolated in Skippy's sperm, and is identified as Polonium, the same substance used by the Russian authorities on critics of their regime. Just as the plane is about to land in New York, another ransom message comes through on the in-flight theatre, stating that due to Inflation, the ransom has now increased to $10,000,000,000.06
Lola finds a helicopter and pilots the group onto a deserted island, where Slappy has seen a light shining through. They arrive to find a wooden hut being used as a relay station for the transmission of ransom demands. They trace the signal to a remote island off the coast of Australia called Bonga Bonga, and Slappy blows up the station with Dynamite to slow the progress of the kidnappers.
Arriving by jet in Bongo Bongo, the angels decide to split up and search the jungle until something can be found. Each one is picked off one by one, and sexually stimulated before being knocked unconcious. Slappy is the only one left, and eventually finds an even larger wood cabin in a piece of flatland. Inside, the angels are tied and gagged to the wall, with Andy tied and gagged on a nearby chair. The villain lurks in the shadows, and explains that the money was to try and build a giant TV station to hypnotise everyone in the world, seeing as bribing PBS cost a hell of a packet.
The monkey ninjas emerge and attack Slappy, rendering her weak. It is only then that the villain emerges, revealing himself to be Steven Spielberg, the head of Wikipedia and boyfriend of Josef Stalin (who was killed in the second film). Spielberg picked on the angels as a revenge for killing his boyfriend, and states that the hypnosis stage is almost complete, as he bought up Wikipedia as a backup plan.
Amidst his gloating, Lola has cut herself free with a nail file, and begins to fight Spielberg. As the fight progresses, Andy's chair is knocked over, and he moves to help Slappy get the others free. One hell of a fight scene pursues, causing the monkey ninjas to retreat, and leaving Spielberg helpless. Rather than surrender, he jumps aboard a waiting Martian tripod, swearing to return, unaware that Skippy had severed one of the legs. The group watches as the Tripod collapses and spurts into flame, before returning to the airport to get all the glory as usual.
The film performed mildly overall, not getting praise and not getting any attacks. The film grossed $2,326,941,002 at the Box Office, being just enough to cover filming costs. Roger Ebert, who reviewed both of the previous films, remarked:
It's a little hard to give a review to a film that sits on the fence. There was action, there was violence, there was fellatio, but it's just so hard to say I'm neutral about a film, especially when I can make or break them with my powers as a Dark Overlord of the Universe...
Curiously, despite being the most recent film of the series, it is also the first to have a soundtrack released alongside the film. The soundtrack contains several songs by Rita and Runt, and is available either as an mp3 or as a tape cassette.
- 1: Slappy's Angels Theme (04:39)
- 2: Runt, you Cunt! (02:26)
- 3: The Ransom (Instrumental) (05:23)
- 4: Lets Try for Two (03:15)
- 5: Shock Treatment (04:17)
- 6: Salmon Fishcake, Double Serving (04:52)
- 8: Runt Fucks my Tits! (04:18)
- 7: Bongo Bongo (Instrumental) (03:51)
- 9: Chariots of Fire (Instrumental) (06:57)
- 10: O Kazakhstan (01:54)
- Slappy Squirrel - Herself
- Lola Bunny - Herself
- Minerva Mink - Herself
- Skippy Squirrel - Himself
- Steven Spielberg - Himself
- User:Crablogger - Andy
- Every Screwball in Finland - The Monkey Ninjas
- PBS - Itself
- Rita and Runt - Singers (Stock footage)
- A. Dalek - The Tripod
- The Screwballs of Finland reprised their role as the Monkey Ninjas.
- This is the first film in the series where Andy has no big part.
- Spielberg had a shave before filming.
- The shooting for Bongo Bongo was done on location in New Zealand.
- The Tripod scene was a last minute edition. Originally, Spielberg was going to escape on a flying bicycle, but the Effects Department couldn't successfully pull it off.
- The Fox Bros. Network is creditted on posters, but the logo is not used due to printing costs that have failed to evaporate since the last film.
|Slappy's Angels series|
|The Angels||Slappy Squirrel • Lola Bunny • Minerva Mink|
|Supporting Cast||Skippy Squirrel • Borat Sagdiyev|
|TV series||Slappy's Angels: 10 Seconds to Armageddon • Azamat Bagatov|